jwar wrote:HAHAHAHA! I love how it's about me!! LOL!
So I want to touch on the mental illness thing because I myself have a mental illness called bipolar disorder. You know, I could use it as a cop out and get disability and actually be on easy street, but I don't. Why? Because I have integrity and refuse to let myself be labeled because of some kind of fucking stupid chemical disorder. I hate this excuse more than anything. There is medication that WILL help people, yet they won't take it. Makes no fucking sense.
I'll tell you this much, if I wasn't on medicine, I'd be in a nut house. That's how bad my shit was.
So on the pedal thing. Regardless of the outcome I'm in Dwarfcrafts corner. Sorry. That's how I feel.
Also ILF is not Devi. It's Tom. It used to be Devi but it's not anymore!!! Not for years and years!!
Now I said I'll stay out of it, but honestly the mental illness thing makes me fucking angry. I'm so goddamn tired of hearing shit like this.
I was just a crazy miserable asshole for a little while. I cop to the fact that I used to go after things that weren't important and I shit on a lot of good friendships. I was a prick to domvan and thom and we were bros and I regret that tremendously. I don't know if aen and I were every really bros but I regret being a jerk to him. I fucked up with SKULLSERVANT and I hadn't even started being bros with him. That kindof pisses me off as we both have about a trilly things in common and we could have been sweet bros. I still actually have some of his old noise releases he sold on DFFD or the goatshed or whatever it was whenever that was going on.
I was in a really shitty place and it changed who I am inside. I started doing a lot of drugs, then even worse I stopped doing a lot of drugs. Also I gained like 150lbs. I took that shit out on others and that's not the person I am or the way I was raised. To be fair you guys knew I wasn't an earthly body long before I lost my shit but that's no excuse.To be 100000000000% honest ive been a member here for almost seven years now and, barring my actual fambly this place was the most constant thing in my life for that whole time. I hate that I shit on it and I regret the way it went down.



