(First off, my apologies if this comes off as spam and is not kosher. To be honest, I’m not even entirely comfortable with it - for a variety of reasons. So if the powers that be or anyone strongly objects drop me a note and I’ll take it down immediately/ASAP. Let me also include, what would be referred to elsewhere on the web as a "trigger warning" - while nothing below is particularly graphic it does discuss issues that may be traumatic to some. Also excuse my usual poor and rambling writing style. That said….)
We all have our favorite season. Whether it’s kitten season down at the Humane Society, the new season of Mad Men, or just that joyful reminder that “Winter is coming”. As we’ve entered into everyone’s favorite season, where we worship and give thanks to our dark lord Secret Satan, there’s also another season upon us - Breast Cancer Awareness Month.
Being a venue primarily frequented by members of the mutated Y-chromosome class, it’s not a topic that comes up much on ILF - although, yeah, guys can get it too - so I thought we (or at least I) could take a minute to talk about it.
Nearly 6 years ago my wife was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma, breast cancer. Despite both my wife and I having dealt with our share of health problems and having faced a particularly tumultuous year, our life was instantly - and quite possibly permanently - changed.
The year that followed was a hell that I wish on none of you - four rounds of chemo, two of which came with allergic reactions so strong they thought she may have to restart treatment entirely; 30+ rounds of radiation, with the requisite tattooing; hydration therapies, iron-infusion therapies, surgery, rehab; watching my wife decide to cut off her hair rather than watch the rest of it fall out……. And we were incredibly lucky. The tumor was small and caught early; we have marginally acceptable insurance, as well as family members that work at the world-class hospital that is walking distance from our apartment; I ran my own business and had the flexibility to take time to be there for doctors appointments and driving her to work when she couldn’t hold on to the handrails on the subway.
Technically, at least based on the standard I used to try to bolster her spirit on darker days, my wife had cancer for less than a month - from that day of the diagnosis until a couple of weeks later when surgeon cut it out. Everything that came after - and it’s not done, there’s still medication to be taken on a daily basis, quarterly visits to oncology and radiology - is just in case…
Half the population are women. Cancer is the 2nd leading killer of women, and breast cancer the most pervasive cancer among women. Women are - regardless of anyone’s personal preferences or peccadilloes - awesome and we’re lucky enough to share the planet with them. Women tackle this disease to the best of their ability with determination, grit, and moxie, with the support of their loved ones, and with help from the medical community.
Ten, twenty, fifty years ago my wife may not have been so lucky. If we lived in any of a million other places in the world, my wife may not have been so lucky. If for any of a thousand reasons we didn’t have access to the advances that modern science have brought us (and continue to bring us - we’re a couple of months away from the release of major study that may drastically change the long term treatment plan for the type of carcinoma my wife dealt with), my wife would not have been so lucky.
So we have to help and support the ladies, yes, but that’s a multifaceted conversation on macro and micro levels. But we also have to help the science, and that’s much easier.
This month you will see or have seen pink ribbons, pink t-shirts, “save the boobies” campaigns, “real men wear pink”, a myriad of ways from the innocuous to the offensive to raise the profile of issues around breast cancer. You’re also going to see events, walks, runs, charity campaigns, fundraisers, calls to action, and outright pleas for cash and support.
You’re reading one right now.
This weekend my wife will be taking part in the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walk in Central Park, as sponsored by the American Cancer Society. More than 12,000 people are expected to participate, from more than 2000 groups, teams, and organizations. My wife and her team of friends is hoping to raise $2600 for the ACS - so far they are more than 2/3rds of the way there.
If any of you had the means and inclination to make a donation of support, it would be greatly appreciated. No donation is too small in this or any important fight - I think the minimum donation is probably a buck. Whatever the amount, it’s tax deductible. The ACS is also setup to accept matching donations from employers, if your job is cool like that. There’s a link below if you’d like to do so.
If you can’t make a donation - and I understand that times are tight, it is for us too - that’s ok. I’d ask that you keep this issue in mind though. I don’t know all the statistics, but I know enough to say fairly confidently that man or woman, this is a disease that will likely touch someone you know at some point in all of our lives. If cash is tight, consider doing something else when/where/however you can. If you’re the type to volunteer, whether it’s at Thanksgiving or MLK day or whenever, see if there’s a cancer-related organization that could use your help for a day or even an hour. Next time your cleaning out your closet, instead of Goodwill or Salvation Army, see if your local hospital or cancer ward accepts donations for patients or for their thrift shop.
In addition to the fundraising efforts, you’ll likely see articles denouncing such efforts, making claims about funds raised going to excessive overhead and not to research and outreach efforts. That may or may not be accurate. I do know that some breast cancer awareness groups are worse (Susan B Komen) than others (ACS is supposed to be pretty reputable).
But it’s more than the money. 12000+ women are going to descend on Central Park this weekend, and while I imagine they may be happy and proud of whatever funds they may have raised, but more so they are they to be together.
They are there because they are happy to be alive.
For my wife, for our family, it’s been a long six years and this weekend’s event has been a long time coming. She’s having a lot fun getting her team together and whatnot, but this weekend is an achievement and a release. She hated the pink, violently, and wanted no part of the breast cancer community for years. Last year she took part in the walk for the first time, but alone, no fundraising, and with much trepidation and lots of looking back and anxiety about her status and feelings about being a “survivor”. I think this weekend, this years’ walk, this effort is her finally getting past most of that fear, the fear of something inside her and/or anything around her possibly making her sick and taking her from her life.
That’s something to celebrate. That’s the sort of fight that we’ve all had to face, or will have to face, or have know and loved someone that has had to face in one way or another. And it’s something to support.
TL;dr. Ladies are awesome. Cancer is bad. Can you help?
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR?fr_id ... id=1714554
Back to your regularly scheduled fuzz/satan programming.
Awesome. I haven't even told my wife that I was doing this, so that will be a welcome surprise. Again, thank you very very much.
