MISSED CONNECTIONS

[D.o.S.]

Esp. on molly.

[excane]

I probably wouldn't tell her that her eyes are huge.

Just tell her they're "pretty".

Yes..... Pretty Huge

[GlitteryChunks]

Dear red headed cashier at the grocery store across the country. When our eyes met and you threw me that devilish smile I knew that had I not currently been in a relationship with my girlfriend whom I care deeply about, I would have walked out of the store just the same as I did but with at least 10x more regret.

[snipelfritz]

My work has a facebook group for missed connections because we're all a bunch of anti-social nerds at a call center who don't have the actual opportunities to talk to each other.

I got namechecked today:

"(414): This goes out to the two most attractive guys in the 414 Nap-tel: [me] and [some other dude]. My god you guys are some serious eye candy.

First off, Mr [me], you are THE best dressed lad in the building, besides maybe [supervisor]. You have the craziest ass I've ever seen, and you wear skin tight jeans constantly. Oh how Id love to be the fly on the wall when you put those on in the morning.

[...]

I swear, if either of you have to do a CTO for me, or vice versa, and you see me get up with a raging hard on, it's not because the call was some half-illiterate juicy Louisiana swamp people finger blasting themselves while I try to properly spell out the different grunting/panting sounds they're making, it's because of you.

If you ever wanna try polish sausage instead of fish tacos, I hope you somehow know to give me a Ringing 1...2...3"

[IEatCats]

Girl working at the thrift shop I bought my giant fur coat from, you had a face that (if I weren't already in a relationship with the woman I plan to marry) would make me fall in love. I feel like you were completely unamused by my purchases, and your judgement was a turn on.

Also, hipster chick in the oversized sweater in front of m in class. I would totally wear sweaters and listen to nmh with you. Just sayin.

[behndy]

My work has a facebook group for missed connections because we're all a bunch of anti-social nerds at a call center who don't have the actual opportunities to talk to each other.

I got namechecked today:

"(414): This goes out to the two most attractive guys in the 414 Nap-tel: [me] and [some other dude]. My god you guys are some serious eye candy.

First off, Mr [me], you are THE best dressed lad in the building, besides maybe [supervisor]. You have the craziest ass I've ever seen, and you wear skin tight jeans constantly. Oh how Id love to be the fly on the wall when you put those on in the morning.

[...]

I swear, if either of you have to do a CTO for me, or vice versa, and you see me get up with a raging hard on, it's not because the call was some half-illiterate juicy Louisiana swamp people finger blasting themselves while I try to properly spell out the different grunting/panting sounds they're making, it's because of you.

If you ever wanna try polish sausage instead of fish tacos, I hope you somehow know to give me a Ringing 1...2...3"

*slow clap of appreciation*

[kbit]

My work has a facebook group for missed connections because we're all a bunch of anti-social nerds at a call center who don't have the actual opportunities to talk to each other.

I got namechecked today:

"(414): This goes out to the two most attractive guys in the 414 Nap-tel: [me] and [some other dude]. My god you guys are some serious eye candy.

First off, Mr [me], you are THE best dressed lad in the building, besides maybe [supervisor]. You have the craziest ass I've ever seen, and you wear skin tight jeans constantly. Oh how Id love to be the fly on the wall when you put those on in the morning.

[...]

I swear, if either of you have to do a CTO for me, or vice versa, and you see me get up with a raging hard on, it's not because the call was some half-illiterate juicy Louisiana swamp people finger blasting themselves while I try to properly spell out the different grunting/panting sounds they're making, it's because of you.

If you ever wanna try polish sausage instead of fish tacos, I hope you somehow know to give me a Ringing 1...2...3"

Wow, & you know the person who posted that? & they posted with your name?
That has sexual harassment termination written all over it.

Dear red headed cashier at the grocery store across the country. When our eyes met and you threw me that devilish smile I knew that had I not currently been in a relationship with my girlfriend whom I care deeply about, I would have walked out of the store just the same as I did but with at least 10x more regret.

[snipelfritz]

No, they posted my name, but I don't know who posted it. Somebody else posts it through an anonymous build-your-own-survey site. And I think it's hilarious...


..but also flattering. It's true that I do have "the craziest ass."

[kbit]

Pic or its a pancake butt.

[snipelfritz]

Domvan seen me IRL, he didn't show it but I know he be all like "DAAAAaaaaaammmmmnnnnn" about the butt.

[Achtane]

To the girl in the grocery store wearing the backless hippie dress/miniskirt thing, as well as one red and one blue sock:
GATDANG YR SCAPULAE WERE RIGHT PURTY
This is not even sexual
YOU GAVE ME A SOULBONER
A BOULNER

[theactionindex]

Dear oddly attractive model on the generic shampoo bottle at the dollar store,

My friend...ish and I were laughing at all of the hilariously terrible faces the underpaid models for the packaging on the generic cosmetic products were making, until I set eyes upon your glorious manbeardface. I would've bought the shampoo to use as a lubricant for the jerk-its later on while thinking of you, but sadly, shampoo makes my pee-hole sting. Our love was not meant to be.

#wishitwasconditioner

[Achtane]

[tuffteef]

to all the harajuku vampire babes creepin down takeshita
wanted to legit wife you

[snipelfritz]

Take shit a?