Worst BOOKER (and/or hooker?) experiences?

[behndy]

[url][/url]ugh. seems like half the time we go through a "booker" (lol. not even going to go into the whole thing about if you're setting up "shows" at dive an sports bars with a rock band a metal band a cover band and a band that doesn't fit and they are spots ANYbody can call with 3 bands and setup a night..... you're not a booker.) it either is an empty spot or the show is just the wrong hands or it falls through or SOMEthing.

we had a show tonight at a spot i honestly wasn't that excited about. they approached us for a Battle Of The Bands, when we sent back we don't do that because...

a) we're not in high school
b) trying to be better than anybody we play with is the antithesis of what i want out of music

they backpedalled and said they used that term jokingly, we were hesitant and went agreed to a show about 4 weeks away. 2 weeks in the grrL we were talking to said she wasn't booking there anymore, passed us off to new guy (who was kinda a prick or just came across as one in emails), he was vague about when we go on and details, then told us today he couldn't line up anybody else it's all us. idiot. if he let us know we could have got some bands.

so we passed on it and told him we're not really interested in playing there.

it's disorganized as butts, but i've ended up actually playing fallen apart shows, and had idiots ask us to play our set, let random people jam on our gear, then play our set again later so that they "keep music going for the time we told the club/bar we'd have live music here". eat a dick.

ch'all? wassat?

[backwardsvoyager]

I haven't played that many shows but every single one has ended up being a disorganised mess pretty much.

Last time someone like that contacted us to play a show they only let us know the night before that there was no backline and we were the only band that they could book.
Had to wait around nearly an hour extra beforehand because the fire alarm went off. And it took about us 3 weeks to get paid (which was barely enough for food and gas that night).

There are so many shitty venues that think 'oh we'll book some bands that will be fun' but then don't promote it and nobody actually hangs around and watches them so you're just awkwardly playing to 2 or 3 people.

[Dr. Sherman Sticks M.D.]

if u build it, they will half listen.

[behndy]

lol. yah. i am done playing sports bars that have a shitty small stage where you're playing for the bartender and 6 regulars that are pissed they can't hear the game and like 5 of your friends.

we usually only try to play clubs that have bars, not bars that put in a 6 inch stage.

[D.o.S.]

Worst Hooker experiences, eh?

[Ancient Astronaught]

we usually only try to play clubs that have bars, not bars that put in a 6 inch stage.

Isn't that "average" ?

[Greenfuz]

i got vd from your mom


that's my second worst hooker experience, you don't wanna know the first

[jrmy]

Ugh... so many. Like the "pro agency" that hooked us up with shows at ski resorts where the venue manager tried to haggle with us, offering to pay extra for another set, and then trying to deduct our food & drink from said extra (claiming that only appetizers and soda were free, despite what he'd said earlier, and despite the fact that we had just played four full sets to a well-filled room).

Or that same agency, where they'd call and ask for four sets two days before the show date (we said no).

Or the club show where my college band opened for a touring band to a sold out club, and the booking agent refused to pay us the $100 he'd promised us.

Or the other club show where we opened for a touring band to a sold out club (300 capacity, and everyone drinking at the bar), and we were told that our take from the door was $50.

Or the show where the booking guy kept telling us to turn down (we were NOT loud) and yelled at us for stacking our cases behind the stage, saying that their rules were empty cases had to be kept outside behind the club.

Or... or... or...

[behndy]

eef. all that sounds soooooo familiar.

WHO. OH WHO. COULD HAVE CHANGED THE TITLE OF THIS THREAD. WHO WAS THAT. WHO.

..... don't think my mawmz has ever had vd. you must have banged her fat sister. that bitch, besides being one of the worst people i've ever met, has always looked chock full of infection. and her needle play time didna help with that i'm sure.

[behndy]

i got vd from your mom


that's my second worst hooker experience, you don't wanna know the first

"no what was the first?"

"sigh. got vd from MY mom. ugh."

[devideva]

Dah, how sweet.

[jrmy]

eef. all that sounds soooooo familiar. .

Actually the WORST was with that "Pro Agency" that got us the ski resort gigs. We actually had one really great gig, playing New Year's Eve at a pretty decent mountain in New England. I couldn't be there for the big gig because of family obligations, but we got a substitute bassist for that night, and I played the next night, which was still pretty great. A month or so later, they booked us there again. Unfortunately, no sooner did we make it to our lodgings at the mountain (night before the gig) and load our stuff into the venue, than our singer/guitar player came down with THE ABSOLUTE PLAGUE. He was a hot effing mess... and could barely speak (a problem since he was going to have to sing four sets). This was one of those quick onset things - he was feeling kinda not too great on the drive up and during load-in, and then within an hour, he looked like he had been hit by a truck. Spiked a fever, the whole nine yards. So this was like 3:00 the day before the show - 27 hours before we were supposed to start. So first thing, I called the booking agency and said, "look, I'm really sorry, but we can't play the gig," and explained the whole thing.

Their response: "you have to go on." My response: "No, you don't understand. This isn't a little head cold. HE CANT STAND UP." Their response: "You'd better fix this, or you'll never get a gig through us again." My response: "I'm trying to fix this by giving you advance warning. You're a booking company. Don't you have other bands you could book?" Their response: "You guys need to do something." My response: "I AM DOING SOMETHING. I CALLED YOU, THE BOOKING COMPANY!"

Seriously, this Kafka-esque conversation went on for what seemed like ages. Finally, they called the manager of the mountain's club, found out there was a popular band in the area who might do it, got through to the band, and booked them. We spent the night in the crappy mountain worker apartments (this was no deluxe lodging), and loaded out our stuff the next day, less than 24 hours after load-in. Of course the booking company told me we were through with them...

... and of course they called two weeks later asking if we could play the next weekend.

I told them to never call again.

THE END.

[behndy]

there's this whole.... mindset with most bookers. they don't seem to care about their clients at all, just the money. and more than just in an acceptable capitilist way. it's like an aggressive angry thing. like they got burned hella hard the first time they trusted someone and Daddy either hugged them entirely too much or not enough.

..... huh. not unlike hookers.

[fiddelerselbow]

I used to play in a post-rock band and we ended up being booked (unbeknownst to us) for a wedding reception in a small pub in Northern Ireland. I still have no fucking idea how it happened.

[behndy]

lol. how'd the show go?