DOG FOUND(RETURNED *farts*)

[ryan summit]

look who i just found

wandering the alley by my house
so hot and thirsty
now in my house in the a.c.
seems to be a pup
red nose pit i think
with the brown eyes
with balls
so happy and friendly
blinks is tryin to show him whos boss
i couldnt leave him inthe heat or to get hit
made flyers
started talikin bout the humane society
and mols is like
"what are you talking about dude
you said the only way youd get a dog
is if one found you and needed help"
im all like
man i hope someone sees the flyer and calls
else its N.D.D.
NEW DOG DAY!!!!!

[ryan summit]

he finally layed dowm
holy smokes
what kisses this guy gives
and not a peep
blinky keeps growlin
showin teeth
and nippin at his toes
this guy could care less
he listens to blinks commands
but keeps pacin and panting
been a couple hours now
finally layed down
oop hes up again
what a nice bo
he just wants so much attention


look at this face
what am i gonna do guys?
youll help me name if i keep him right?
i promise polls and prizes
i gotta think about it
i really hope his folks call
if not i hate people just a bit more today
what hes not tough enough a pit
is that what it is
sorry this stuff just makes me pissed

[Deltaphoenix]

His name is...Sarge

[Gone Fission]

Make sure he doesn't go back to the sort of asshole who makes a sweet, eager-to-please dog into a fighting dog. I've met some great pits or mixes but there's no shortage of assholes who actively try to make them into dangerous animals.

And if you keep him, figure out how to train him so that he isn't aggressive. Serious business doing that right because of the strength these guys have. Chihuahuas will bite more often, but when a pit bites it'll seriously matter.

With the pacing and panting I'd be a bit worried that he may have been injured before you found him. Any limping or oddness in his gait? If the pacing and panting keeps up too long think about a vet visit.

[THEBEERHAMMER]

AWWWWWWWWWW

[THEBEERHAMMER]

WHOS A BOOOO. WHOS A BOO BOO BOO

[ryan summit]

his name is scoob
and the flyers worked
walkin back home with an empty leash
was sad to say the least
nice girl
her voice was crackin on the phone
oh well
i think its time for me to dog up
an hour from now
i dont think i wouldve answered the phone
he is a boo boo
goddammit

[coldbrightsunlight]

This is both happy AND sad. I don't know what to feel.

[THEBEERHAMMER]

God. Damnit.

[ryan summit]

i didnt know what to feel
when i started realizin i had a dog now
you know im all logical
"o.k. up at 7 for a walk
7:45 brakfast
8:15 ILF unread posts......etc"
so im sayin this to him
ehh im bummed
the girl was so nice
shes the kind of person why im a flyer nut
for all the scumbags
someones out there missin their buddy
and id hate it to be me
sorry bout the rollercoaster guys
i gave it a couple hours before posting
he has a good home already
so thats good
he deserves it

so maybe this is now the find r.s. a pup bud
or maybe an old rescue
tell you one thing
blinky is not happy right now
hes actually hiding like in thunder
i think he got attached too
its that quick
it takes 3 hours to fall in love

[htsamurai]

This is the happiest and saddest post in ILF history

god I miss my dog...
fuck you ryan

[THEBEERHAMMER]

OH SHIT DUDES I KNOW.

You should keep totally swinging by her place and shit to check on the dog. Cause you in the neighborhood and shit. But make it look like youre just doing it to see her. Women are vain and stoops like that. Do that a couple of times then just ask her out. She'll go out with you as long as youre not like 500 lbs. Youre not like 500 lbs right? Anyway just keep dating her. Now not only do you have a bitch on the side but you can see puppy any time you want. Worst case scenario you have to bone an uggs chick but hey at least the puppy is cute.

[ryan summit]

i need your brain in a jar
and hook it up to mine
when i feel uncertain in life
or maybe just take sips of the brainpickle juice
none of that is applicable in my life
since i live around the block with my girlfriend
but you make it sound so reasonable and doable

sorry ht
the reason i havent had a dog in 14 yrs
is cause i miss my ra-digga
but we're thinkin its time now
scoob isnt the only dude that needs a buddy

OHHH AND 500 POUNDS!?
i cant gain weight to save my life
if we crashed in alaska
youd look at me like uncooked edamame

[THEBEERHAMMER]

i need your brain in a jar
and hook it up to mine
when i feel uncertain in life
or maybe just take sips of the brainpickle juice
none of that is applicable in my life
since i live around the block with my girlfriend
but you make it sound so reasonable and doable

Bro im sayin its a side bitch right?

[Josh Pelican]

You should definitely hook up with this broad...