dealing with ex-bandmates

[behndy]

sigh. so damn bummed. band i'm in had a huge unexpected falling out with a member (giggety). we parted ways, the ex member apparently hates the me and the drummer now (not getting into details, it was their choice to leave). i changed the band email's password, took the other person off of FB as an admin on the band page, but forgot to do anything to the YouTube channel and forgot that they had set up the band email originally so didn't change the recovery options. a few hours ago the password was changed on the YT channel and the band gmail.

is there anything we can do? the YT channel is the most important, it's got enough followers that we have the ending to the URL we want. is this something YT would work with us on if we filed a complaint?

we contacted the ex band member about getting the passwords, but i'm not very optimistic about that turning out well.

any advice?

[D.o.S.]

Aside from asking nicely (which you already have), I'd say that creating another gmail and youtube account as a backup/eventuality is probably a smart move.

You know, "the real blood party" at gmail/youtube or something.

[behndy]

shit. yeah.

sigh. we were going for a whole thing with We Are Blood Party.

this shit is so exhausting. who has the time or energy to fuck with people they say they want nothing to do with like this?

[devnulljp]

I find a shallow grave helps. Make sure to remove the teeth and hands so they can't be identified later and traced back to you.
And douse the body in lye before burial...

[D.o.S.]

shit. yeah.

sigh. we were going for a whole thing with We Are Blood Party.

this shit is so exhausting. who has the time or energy to fuck with people they say they want nothing to do with like this?

I can sympathize with you there. Look at it this way, though--at least your bandmate didn't bail on you at the eleventh hour of a tour/recording sesh/etc. That's when shit gets really real, in my Martin Lawrence experience.

[The4455]

I would suggest that the three of you just sit down and talk it over, it takes some people a while for things to really sink in, she may just be reacting out of spite to say that "How could you carry on without me I built this band blah, blah, blah." You just have to lay all the cards on the table and tell her what's what, you're in charge not her.

When my last band broke up it was a a shit-hurricane, one of the other guys kinda went of the deep end, we're okay-ish now, but it took a couple of minths for him to get over it and get all of the "stuff" out of his system.

Good Luck, also not over lunch if she gets really mad she might toss her drink on you!

[Deltaphoenix]

Bum-Mer...
Sorry about the drama homie.

[behndy]

thing is.... every correspondance i've had has been me (at least i thought so) being polite and gentle, and horrible vile stuff comes back. for some reason she can "barely stand talking to" my drummer, and HATES me. i don't think she'll do a sit down. i'm not totally sure WHAT'S going on, but she hasn't expressed any interest in keeping any of the music or anything. it's pretty clear cut who did what, i was responsible for the bass, which was 90% of the melodic instrument stuff, Paul did all of the drums, she did all of the vox and keys.

i'm actually kinda worried about her. she's not a bad person. i don't really understand how stuff got so bad so quick, but seriously, she HATES me.

i was wondering if anybody's had any experience trying to get YT to intervene in stuff like this?

[Mudfuzz]

i was wondering if anybody's had any experience trying to get YT to intervene in stuff like this?

is there any way you can prove to youtube you own the vids? otherwise.. I'm not sure what you can do.. when it comes to this stuff who has the passwords has control..

[Haki]

Your YT page has 4 subscribers, Shirley you have enough Green Tea KitKats left to get 4 people to subscribe to your new page. Plus the videos kinda prominently feature your now former shrieker, nothing really lost there.

Email would be a bit more annoying losing any running exchanges for bookings and possibly contacts, but at least it's a good reason to lose the We ARE BP bit, which I've always found lame (makes it sound more like a fan club than a band, but that's just me).

Speculating, but I can only see YT doing anything other than a polite refusal if the account was registered using Blood Party as the owner and not in your former shrieker's name. Then you just need to prove to YT that you are in fact Blood Party while your shrieker no longer isn't.

[behndy]

yeah. it's not a HUGE deal (i kinda liked the We Are Blood Party Thing..... 'cept she came up with it, and all this is leaving a horrrrrrrible taste in the mouth so to speak), but there's some annoying changeover stuff i'd have to do that would be avoided if we can keep the same sites.

but you're right. the small amount of subs on that channel DOES make it less of a thing. i hadna even noticed that.

a lot of it is i'm really bummed about how angry all this got so quick i guess.

[behndy]

i was wondering if anybody's had any experience trying to get YT to intervene in stuff like this?

is there any way you can prove to youtube you own the vids? otherwise.. I'm not sure what you can do.. when it comes to this stuff who has the passwords has control..

nope. believe she originally uploaded the vids. but Haki's right. all we really have up there is stuff with her in it.

hurm. actually, thinking about it, kinda getting to where maybe i don't care about the email or YT channel that much. we DID just start out, so it's not like a lot will be lost if we move those.

i..... i like you guys.

[Haki]

You've been as excited as a little girl getting a pony for the past seven months about this, of course you're bummed out. Given the drama, any hassle that changeover brings is probably a whole lot less than having to deal with shrieky pipes again.

(i kinda liked the We Are Blood Party Thing..... 'cept she came up with it, and all this is leaving a horrrrrrrible taste in the mouth so to speak)

She didn't happen to come up with that 'passion and platelets' thing either did she? Cause (piling on), not a fan of that either.

[behndy]

lol. yeah...... wasn't a fan of that.

i like her. i think she's a good person in a lot of ways. i think she's a VERY talented singer and i loved working with her. i am bummed it didn't work out.

...... you have a pony? i LOVE ponies!!

[Haki]

...... you have a pony? i LOVE ponies!!

I really really believe that.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IVMKQP0K3a0[/youtube]