Food that sucks but you eat it anyway

[gnomethrone]

i just ate a vending machine chicken patty because i drank beer and carved pumpkins last night instead of cooking something to bring to work. tasted like absence and loss.

[More_Divebombs]

Love some shitty pizza. An Ohio chain called Marcos just opened a few locations in our area and we have been all about that. McDonald's like twice a month after the kids karate class = instant regret. Lately flipping ranch dressing. Not sure when or why that happened, have always hated it but now I'd take a bath it the stuff.

Ranch! I too don't understand why I started resorting to Ranch.

One time when I was having wedges, I was out of ketchup. I had some ranch in the fridge. Shall I just have a little blob on the side? Nah, I'll just pour it all over the wedges until I can't see the wedges. What even possessed me to do that? Ranch has a hold over me that when I inexplicably have a hankering for some, I just slop it all on. I drown the food I am eating in that vinegary, herby, dick milk. Even when I am not out of ketchup anymore, I think "Ah, just a little bit of ranch, for a change" as I'm punching the underside of the bottle to GET IT ALL OUT. No sickly garlic gloop left behind. One bottle = one serving.


I don't know if you get these outside of the UK, but I am all about these:


Mechanically recovered processed Turkey mush, coated in that artificially dyed YELLOW breadcrumb, with a garlic cream cheese filling. Give them a quick deep fry and gorge until you hate yourself. I put a handful of them between a couple of slices of bread and butter. A mini-kiev sandwich. Because I was born without the feeling of shame. I cannot be shamed.

I think I'm dying.