I Fucking Hate Cats

[Invisible Man]

They are cruel, rude, indifferent, they smell bad, they are NOT cute (this is inarguable; fuck you for thinking otherwise), their claws are little daggers, they rub up against you like slutty goddamn otters, but only when they want something. I have never felt so manipulated as when in the company of cats. Or as prone to sneezing.

Someone please explain 1) why anyone would want these feline abominations as pets, and 2) the history behind finding them acceptable members of the animal kingdom.

[Chankgeez]

They kill mice.

[Mudfuzz]

I feel the same but with slightly different adjectives about dogs.

[Chankgeez]

I cats & dogs.

[blakestree]

I cats & dogs.

[gnomethrone]

I feel the same way but about humans.
also:

[Invisible Man]

I cats & dogs.

The war is coming. Choose a side.

[Chankgeez]

[PeteeBee]

They are indifferent and they rub up against you like slutty goddamn otters.

Like so many women I've loved before.

[Blackened Soul]

[snipelfritz]

I respect that cats can exist on their own.

The thing is that dogs only exist because we've created them. It's like this whole cruel existential prank on an entire species.

[Blackened Soul]

The thing is that dogs only exist because we've created them

created.. more like took something awesome and turned it into a mutant.

[snipelfritz]

The thing is that dogs only exist because we've created them

created.. more like took something awesome and turned it into a mutant.

Yeah, an existentially devoid monstrosity.

[CyaNitrate]

I grew up with dogs, my parents bred labs for a while. My dad hated cats, so by extension, I thought I did too, and we never had them.

Fast forward 15-20 years, I get married. She wants a cat, I say I don't, so inevitably, we get a cat. And he picks me as his human, because I don't smother him.

As it turns out, I'm far more of a cat person than I ever was a dog person. Cats are way easier. make sure they have food, water, and clean litter and they're golden. No need for walks or constant attention. They're perfect if you have a 9-5 and can't always come home to let them out. We get each other. We give each other space and affection alternately. He's pretty damn awesome. His name is Ares.

[CyaNitrate]

I don't care what you say, this is goddamned adorable. This was right after we got him.

And more recently...forced perspective makes him look much bigger than he actually is