the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thread

snipelfritz · Post by **snipelfritz** » Fri Sep 22, 2017 4:59 pm

With great confidence comes great wonfidence.

Invisible Man · Post by **Invisible Man** » Fri Sep 22, 2017 7:27 pm

Goddamn I have some cervix material that would slay here, but my marriage would be over.

comesect2.0 · Post by **comesect2.0** » Fri Sep 22, 2017 8:21 pm

A stich in time saves 9. ....if ya know what I mean, just wait till that heals really good then it's like being touched for the very first time ya dig?

Invisible Man · Post by **Invisible Man** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 1:23 am

To clarify the big news about my child's testicles:

I asked the nurse why his balls are so fucking big, and she said "yeah...he's just a big boy..."

Wait what did you just hit on my seven hour-old? Because I mean I don't wanna brag, but I've seen my fair share of infant testicles. I have LIVED, after all. And these are no run-of-the-mill nads. I mean I believe her, but let's have for respect and NOT REFER TO THE BABY ONLY BY HIS GENITALS. I mean balls as synecdoche for baby is inappropriate, right? Who talks about baby balls like that?

I used to think that the sack was just your bladder, but was confused by the actual balls, and terrified I'd have to pee them out one day.

Ok I'll stop talking about balls (no I won't).

#proudpapa

Invisible Man · Post by **Invisible Man** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 1:26 am

Researching ball reduction surgery now.

Invisible Man · Post by **Invisible Man** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 1:28 am

You may have heard of dad dick. But do you know about Baby Balls?

Invisible Man · Post by **Invisible Man** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 1:35 am

Poor guy's gonna be taller sitting down than standing up.

Invisible Man · Post by **Invisible Man** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 1:36 am

Q: hey what's bigger than a golf ball but smaller than a Volkswagen?

A: my kid's balls.

Invisible Man · Post by **Invisible Man** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 1:38 am

Half hour comedy special coming out. "Bawlin' and Ballin.'"

Pronounce THAT, JonnyAngle. You know what I'm tocking about.

Iommic Pope · Post by **Iommic Pope** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 2:09 am

Congrats on your little sack whacker there, mate.

drolo · Post by **drolo** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 4:18 am

i'm sure the rest of the kid will grow around the balls just fine. sometimes they develop the stuff they are more likely to use most before the other stuff :-)

Eivind August · Post by **Eivind August** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 8:11 am

Congrats on the balls, I'man.

Disarm D'arcy · Post by **Disarm D'arcy** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 12:59 pm

snipelfritz · Post by **snipelfritz** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 6:26 pm

Invisible Man wrote:Poor guy's gonna be taller sitting down than standing up.

Like his balls are a gigantic hippoty hop? Like that episode of South Park? I feel like I'm missing something here.

$harkToootth · Post by **$harkToootth** » Sat Sep 23, 2017 6:45 pm

$harkToootth wrote:For the boyz...

"EH DAD...getta load'a deez"

ilovefuzz.com

the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thread

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr

Re: the happiness, excitement, and general contentedness thr