ilovefuzz.com

So after years of deliberation, second thoughts and some stalling I am taking my first step towards voluntary sterilization. I'm a little apprehensive,...today is the consultation appointment and I'm not sure what to say, but I hear if you say the wrong things they won't let you have a vasectomy. It's also funny how most the people IRL that I tell this to think I'm nuts, making a decision I'll regret.

I'm 31 and have been with the same woman for 5 years; half of which we've been married. We don't have kids and have no interest in ever having kids. In all honestly,...I hate kids. I figure you have to be a masochistic insomniac fecalphiliac (not in a sexual way) in order to want children. I see those SUVs with the vinyl stickers portray the mommy and the daddy and the 4 kids plus the cat and the dog and I puke in my mouth a little. The idea of child rearing,...starting a family,...."living the American dream" sickens me. It all seems very Christian (which I am not),...and expected of me (I prefer the unexpected, or at least not doing what everyone expects me to do) I like my lifestyle,...I like not being woken up every hour. I like not being vomited on,....I like that the only poop I have to clean up are solid little dog and cat turds. I like the quiet relaxing sanctuary of my home. I like not having to share my wife with anyone.

Then there is a whole life after the shitting, crying, diaper changing, etc. etc. Cost of medical care, physicals, replacing hockey pads and skates as the kid grows up, braces, SUV insurance, gas, food (we can barely keep ourselves fed), childhood obesity, diabetes,..kidnappers ransom, piano lessons, college (thanks for hooking me up with that one parents )...

My wife has been on birth control throughout our entire relationship and since before. How long she's been on it I don't know but I think it's time we get her off of it. The cost of our insurance is tripling and the co-pay for her birth control is going from $50 a month to $75 a month. Apparently Asuris thinks we are rich, which we by no means are. She uses the ring (one ring to rule them all) and there are cheaper alternatives but we have no idea what the long term effects of being on those hormones are. I am very much looking forward to seeing how my wife is once we get her off birth control.

Lastly,...we aren't opposed to adoption. Our way of looking at the world can be somewhat cynical,...but there are an awful lot of unwanted children out there and if we ever decide that we want to clean up shit, become sleep deprived, and go deaf and insane, we would rather be the solution to a problem rather than create our own. I feel like I'm pretty set in my ways at 31,...but people change and if we do I think it's cynical to believe that we can't love someone else' kid.

Anyway,...that was just my stream of consciousness,...but it would be nice to hear the ILFers' experiences,...criticisms,...etc on this. I know there are some ILFers that have families and I respect that and by no means intend to bad mouth you guys. At least you know that Fuzz > SUVs.

http://www.vhemt.org/

The woman and I don't particularly care for kids, but we're not opposed to having them. We're also not opposed to not having them. I'd rather have a dog, and we don't even have that yet. Just a fish. For now.

EDIT: Oh yeah, on the way to work one morning I saw some dude driving his pickup truck with one of those Sticker Family things. It was him and a cat, that's it. As I drove by I noticed just how content the dude looked with pretty much everything. He was smiling even, and not in one of those I'M CRAZY GIDEON type of ways.

congrats dude. i've thought about it myself for a long time... same reasons.

I feel the exact same way. I'm not into those family stickers. Stupid fad! And if I ever decided to start a family adoption is where I'd go. It is amazing how many children there are without anyone. I have this discussion with my friends and they argue its not the same and they want "their own". I always counter with the fact the kids would like "their own" as well.

nad wrote:

http://www.vhemt.org/

The woman and I don't particularly care for kids, but we're not opposed to having them. We're also not opposed to not having them. I'd rather have a dog, and we don't even have that yet. Just a fish. For now.

EDIT: Oh yeah, on the way to work one morning I saw some dude driving his pickup truck with one of those Sticker Family things. It was him and a cat, that's it. As I drove by I noticed just how content the dude looked with pretty much everything. He was smiling even, and not in one of those I'M CRAZY GIDEON type of ways.

I like the thank you for not breeding sticker on the vhemt site, and that's basically where I fall. Around this town (I used to be a bus commuter,...thank god I bought a bike) I see a lot of white trash teenager crackers with their ill behaved spawn in tow and it honestly disgusts me. No more cracker spawn please. I know I can't control the decisions people make,...but it seems like those that are the least prepared for child rearing are the ones having the most kids.

Children are just parasites. They start leeching off the woman the moment they are concieved (not to mention they will ruin the woman's figure, not to get all shallow and superficial).

People turn all,..."look at the adorable little baby,...ashyabooboodoopadoopa,....." ARGH Please stop you sound like an idiot. I'm sorry babies aren't cute. They are fat little rolly polly shit, piss and puke factories. They stink and they can't eat food without making a giant mess,...one that I'll have to clean up (thanks for the chore,...like I don't have enough).

Then there's the whole,..."we have to protect the children,...what about the children" mentality that leads to censorship,...morality pushing,...and fear mongering. Fuck your kids. They are going to figure out what colorful language and boobs/vaginas/cocks are with or without the parental advisory or the R rating. And no I'm not going to buy five deadbolts for each door, a shotgun and a pay per month alarm/monitoring system because mass media has convinced me that every criminal is out to rape my kid.

I'm sure that some people think having kids is the best decision they've ever made,...but to me,...it's just a mistake.

Sorry,...I didn't mean for this to turn into bashing children/families/parents.

If you feel this strongly against having kids youre probably not going to get any ever so I don't see what's wrong with the decision.

Just make sure that you have deliberated it long and hard!

this thread makes me sad...

...but whatever you feel you need to be happy, man

DarkAxel wrote:this thread makes me sad...

...but whatever you feel you need to be happy, man

Sorry.

Being a father is definitely not high on my to do list. I'm a 31 year old child myself.

But will your penis ever forgive you?

As someone who just had his first child a month ago tomorrow, I can say that it has been absolutely amazing and exciting.

BUT

Having a child will be the worst experience of your life if you're not TOTALLY into it. So I would say that this sounds like you know yourself and is probably the right decision.

warwick.hoy wrote:Sorry.

Not your fault... i don't know why but i'm looking forward to having a family... i'd like to be a good father, the one i never had

and i want to bring up some decent people. The world needs a few more


yeah... it will be hard finding out after my second divorce that my son sucks cock for heroin and my daughter is sleeping with everyone around, including my best friends but i like to dream

warwick.hoy wrote:
My wife has been on birth control throughout our entire relationship and since before. How long she's been on it I don't know but I think it's time we get her off of it. The cost of our insurance is tripling and the co-pay for her birth control is going from $50 a month to $75 a month. Apparently Asuris thinks we are rich, which we by no means are. She uses the ring (one ring to rule them all) and there are cheaper alternatives but we have no idea what the long term effects of being on those hormones are. I am very much looking forward to seeing how my wife is once we get her off birth control.

My advice is to get her the fuck OFF that shit, my previous gf used it, but it made her fucking crazy.

Worked at a convenience store in Richmond. It was amazing how ignorant the customers were and how often people threatened me, when I'd make them feel stupid when they couldn't understand me. The worst part of the job is they all had kids...lots of them and they are still kids themselves. Sad

smile_man wrote:

warwick.hoy wrote:
My wife has been on birth control throughout our entire relationship and since before. How long she's been on it I don't know but I think it's time we get her off of it. The cost of our insurance is tripling and the co-pay for her birth control is going from $50 a month to $75 a month. Apparently Asuris thinks we are rich, which we by no means are. She uses the ring (one ring to rule them all) and there are cheaper alternatives but we have no idea what the long term effects of being on those hormones are. I am very much looking forward to seeing how my wife is once we get her off birth control.

My advice is to get her the fuck OFF that shit, my previous gf used it, but it made her fucking crazy.

The wife is relatively rational and even keeled. I'm hoping that going off the hormones will help her control her weight better, not to be shallow and superficial. She's not a fatty,...but she isn't as slender as she used to be,...and I like slender. I'm lucky,...I'm a skinny fuck and I don't have to work at it too hard.

Sounds like you're making the right decision for you and your wife. As long as you are comfortable with adoption, down the road... because people do change their minds on this, I've seen it many times.

That said.

Parenthood is what the parents make of it. My children are AWESOME. They have none of the problems you list. It really, truly is all about what you put in, what you do... when you are a good parent, your children become your best friends, they are not any hassle at all. And, your relationship with your wife becomes stronger. It's tough to explain to someone who doesn't know, let alone has no interest in it. Not all parents are slobbering SUV driving mouth breathers that have no clue about the real world.

I completely understand your point though and applaud you for taking a solid stance and getting your girl off the junk. My wife and I decided to stop after 2 children, and I got snipped. We still drive tiny cars.

Everyone's different. I love my kids and being a dad. But, I HATE dogs and cats. Cannot stand them and see no point in human beings keeping 'pets.' They, to me, have all of the disadvantages of children that you list. Ironic, huh?