musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 7:42 pm
c'mon, your best jokes!
(this thread will end up being 80% about drummers, lol)
(this thread will end up being 80% about drummers, lol)
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Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 7:43 pm
guitarists can't keep time. it's true.
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 7:53 pm
Bassplayers first were terrible guitarplayers..
(true in my case
)
(true in my case
)Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 8:22 pm
Guitarists... tuning.... still tuning... 4 hours later.... tuning....
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 9:11 pm
i thought someone was gonna say oh hes black so he must rap
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 9:25 pm
tuffteef wrote:i thought someone was gonna say oh hes black so he must rap or play bass
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 10:15 pm
unownunown wrote:tuffteef wrote:i thought someone was gonna say oh hes black so he must rap or play bass
or play reggae
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 10:36 pm
Bass players play out of tune. (orchestra)
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 10:52 pm
How do you know a Drummer is at your door?
The knocks Keep speeding up!
Bass players are hard to come by, not true although it's hard to find Drummers
The knocks Keep speeding up!
Bass players are hard to come by, not true although it's hard to find Drummers
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 11:02 pm
nieh wrote:Bass players play out of tune. (orchestra)
it's cuz upright is such a bitch. you have to practice with a tuner all the fucking time and even then. sometimes you'll be in pitch and it'll just be you playing and some other musician and that musician is kinda out of pitch but everyone just goes man it's the bassist because a clarinet has never been out of tune before i guess
(that one hurt me)
oh also... why do drummers have such needy/bitchy/awful girlfriends?
(there is no pun. just truth.)
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Sun Nov 28, 2010 11:08 pm
unownunown wrote:nieh wrote:Bass players play out of tune. (orchestra)
it's cuz upright is such a bitch. you have to practice with a tuner all the fucking time and even then. sometimes you'll be in pitch and it'll just be you playing and some other musician and that musician is kinda out of pitch but everyone just goes man it's the bassist because a clarinet has never been out of tune before i guess
(that one hurt me)
oh also... why do drummers have such needy/bitchy/awful girlfriends?
(there is no pun. just truth.)
True, drummer's girlfriends are pretty bad, and distracting, just let us fucking practice bitch you two can be together later, and being a bass player Upright is hard to play, and I always blame the cellos, they are the worst!
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Mon Nov 29, 2010 2:55 am
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0prsJLDcvQU[/youtube]
There that wraps up all thoughts regarding bass players.
What do you call someone who hangs around musicians?
A drummer.
(I used to know a ton of these all as cringeworthy but I won't torture you with them)
There that wraps up all thoughts regarding bass players.
What do you call someone who hangs around musicians?
A drummer.
(I used to know a ton of these all as cringeworthy but I won't torture you with them)
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Mon Nov 29, 2010 9:36 am
YOURNOTAGUITARPLAYERUNLESSYOUCANPLAYSONGSTHATILIKE.
YOURNOTUSINGAMICROPHONE?
YOURNOTUSINGAMICROPHONE?
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Mon Nov 29, 2010 12:00 pm
smile_man wrote:YOURNOTUSINGAMICROPHONE?
hahah This actually happened to you pretty recently did it not?
Re: musician stereotypes
Posted: Mon Nov 29, 2010 2:15 pm
These are best told in the form of awful vaudevillian jokes.
What's the best tuner for the upright bass in a jazz context?
The piano player.
How do you know a musician is on your door step?
When he gives you your pizza.
How many country bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
One, five, one, five....
How many bass players does it take to change a spotlight?
Doesn't fucking matter, they'll never be in it.
What's the difference between a viola player and a prostitute?
A prostitute knows more than two positions.
(Maybe a bit TOO nerdy on that last one. Or, all of them. Ah, fuck it.)
What's the best tuner for the upright bass in a jazz context?
The piano player.
How do you know a musician is on your door step?
When he gives you your pizza.
How many country bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
One, five, one, five....
How many bass players does it take to change a spotlight?
Doesn't fucking matter, they'll never be in it.
What's the difference between a viola player and a prostitute?
A prostitute knows more than two positions.
(Maybe a bit TOO nerdy on that last one. Or, all of them. Ah, fuck it.)