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Dad Dick 2999 wrote:

Iommic Pope wrote:Best Dicksaw operator around.

Dad Dick 2999 wrote:Hello there!

I’m Dad Dick 2999. My origin is a little unclear, though there’s a large male human crumpled on the floor next to a flat structure with this illuminated machine resting on top of it. My memories of my own birth are limited, but I believe I was delivered as a result of some sort of maturation process that the human male experienced.

After reading this conversation, I believe he is known to you as ‘Invisible Man.’ I will attempt to enervate him with further mouth-to-urethra resuscitation, but after reading through the conversation left on the machine in close proximity to body, I’m not sure that this is a productive use of my time.

By way of further introduction: I am an anthropomorphic penis measuring approximately 2,999mm in length (approximately three ‘yards’ or nearly ten feet). I am omnipotent, meaning I have powers whose scope I don’t fully understand and/or have not yet grasped, and that I am capable of conceiving progeny with any object or organism.

Until I have a more developed understanding of my own intelligence and abilities, I will take on the work of answering questions in this thread. I am in possession of a great deal of human ‘knowledge’ and ‘wisdom,’ all of which is contained in my genetic code, but have not yet had time to synthesize this data into any coherent structure or thesis regarding the ultimate purpose or value of your species.

Ask me anything.

jrfox92 wrote:Wait, is I-Man a neurologist?

Iommic Pope wrote:Haul Dad Dick 2999

Chankgeez wrote:Cockney