ilovefuzz.com

Ugly Nora wrote:drolo, have you accepted Jesus Christ as our one true lord and savior?

Stop dodging your own question, Nora.

Invisible Man wrote:Follow the Smoke toward the Riff-Filled Land

no.

After Kirk hammets notebook was destroyed, the riff filled land disappeared.

Is that why that album sucked so hard they had to pay off all the online reviewers to worship it?

Iman, Ive been trying to pry at the Pandora's box of my own dissatisfaction at the moment.
Check out Dabrowski's Positive Disintegration if you haven't already.
It won't answer any questions but it may provide with a line of inquiry to help make sense of shit.
If you aren't familiar with it, I think it'll click with you once you suss it.
Take it with a grain of salt, but basically, pain is good, struggle is growth. Etc.

Did. It clicked. Gonna disappear into a research void for a while to get to the bottom of this. Gotta learn Polish first.

Yooo I have been in this hole myself lately. I'm almost out of debt and to the 'save up' portion of my get-broke-quick scheme to quit my job, abandon my insurance, hustle for money, and live on my own terms. All in all I have a bitchin' job, and one whose luxuries I fear would not be waiting for me in practically any other job, should I fail and return to the normal workforce. That said, I still brim with feelings ranging from anger to dread every goddamn morning on my morning commute.
With the success thing, I totally feel you. This was a sick job when I graduated college and was only supposed to be 2 years to bolster my resume before i reapplied to PhD programs. I'm 2 weeks out from 3 years now and I haven't even given thought to the concept of PhD programs in 1.5 years at least. What felt like a great score to me at first has slowly transformed into an albatross and a burden. I think I hate my job because I have to have it more than i hate what I do. I also haven't seen my pay go up a penny since I began working, and that lack of upward mobility is really unappealing.

I think you just have to ask yourself what you really want. If that's something reasonable then fear of a little hurt on your end shouldn't prohibit you. If it's something unreasonable like "own seven world-class casino and resorts and also make everyone like me all the time" then you might need to reconsider, but I feel like your desires are probably a little more grounded. At a certain point I am the one who gets up every day and goes to work and puts myself in this situation I hate because I have decided that money is necessary, and to forget that is to surrender my agency to something outside of myself. So much of this comes down to the language we use, the narratives we've been fed and sold, and our subconscious motivation and fears.

So what're you looking for? More agency? More impact? More wealth? Or...???

JonnyAngle wrote:I disagree with this. I work for my parents, so I am perceived as an owner... I always tell the funniest jokes that anyone has ever heard. My ideas are always the best. I do not get the enjoyment of genuine camaraderie. I'm like the 5 year old playing poker with his grandfather who always wins. I have to challenge myself, because no one else will. That's what "it's lonely at the top" means to me.

this made me burst into audible laughter at work

It is my privilege to look after a bunch of people, so I need to make enough to do that without compromising my values. That's pretty much it. The problem is that my values are basically antithetical to those found anywhere but academe. Maybe the biggest issue is that I am terrible at having a boss. I'd provide examples, but they'd sound like fake examples of edgelording.

Really, I need to find a primo gig at a sane college or university that will give me leeway to do what I think is good/right/just/&c. Which is what this is supposed to be. I have feelers out all over; talked with a recruiter yesterday. But people who report to me and like having me around as an insulator from evil bullshit are getting worried about my longevity. Three people darkened my door yesterday alone to tell me that.

We should talk about more schooling, BM. I just don't want the thread to become about me specifically, so I'll hold off. I framed this pretty abstractly for a reason, I guess.

I am terribly unhappy in my professional life. The career I am in has been good for the family financially but terrible for mental health/stability. Just passed my ten year anniversary with the company and wanted to hang myself. This will be my last year for sure. The wife and I are in the beginning stages of launching our own business ( a hair salon as she is super talented ). Figure if I am going to be working 14 hour days 6 days a week it might as well be for something that is ours.

This is all helpful stuff, and I hope to see more.

But.

Can we start planning for a fuzz commune here? Perhaps lay out our grand plan for an intentional community? If folks feel a need, they can nominate themselves or others to specific areas of expertise.

1) Pool our money and resources (ha)
2) Buy a plot of land somewhere very remote
3) Establish power, water, waste removal, wifi
4) Construct central gear areas with common usage/access
5) Build private dwellings because we are all painfully introverted and need our SPACE
6) Develop shared governance system for maintaining standard of work and living
7) Fail to profit

Invisible Man wrote:This is all helpful stuff, and I hope to see more.

But.

Can we start planning for a fuzz commune here? Perhaps lay out our grand plan for an intentional community? If folks feel a need, they can nominate themselves or others to specific areas of expertise.

1) Pool our money and resources (ha)
2) Buy a plot of land somewhere very remote
3) Establish power, water, waste removal, wifi
4) Construct central gear areas with common usage/access
5) Build private dwellings because we are all painfully introverted and need our SPACE
6) Develop shared governance system for maintaining standard of work and living
7) Fail to profit

i'll bring the foam

JonnyAngle wrote: i'll bring the foam

8. Build an Arby's

9. establish some rules aimed at harmonizing the cohabitation of nudist and non-nudist riffing members

That one's easy. Either nude or black robes.