ilovefuzz.com

Lemurs are the best, monkeys are the silly savages that draw you in with their weirdness and cute hugging, then right as you see your about to get fucked over, it already has happened from the one you didn't see behind you.

Disarm D'arcy wrote:I have a long post to type about Belgian airlines, Belgian passengers, Belgian airports, Belgians at the Belgian airports.

Belgian airlines: had 3 flights with them on my way and back and forth to Oslo. Not a single one on time. The last two just didn't happen because grossly idiotic company (delays three flights on the same night - yes night) for no apparent reason (later proven to be true because I got DAMAGES). Arrived home with about 20 hours of delay.

Belgian passengers: first flight going to Brussels from France, I had a dick in front of me who made it a point to recline his seat well into my knees. After me asking the flight attendent 3 times to ask him to at least set it above my knees, and flight attendent being fed up with him because every time he would recline back into my knees immediately after the flight attendant walked away. I also want to point that flight is just slightly longer than an hour. Also, the flight attendent was excellent, so you know that airline wasn't Belgian but British.

Belgian airports: anyone who has ever set a foot in Brussels airport knows.

Belgians and the Brussels airports: clerk at Travelex said to me when I tried negotiating a better rate "if you can't afford it, don't travel"; clerk at cheapest food place (which was still expensive as fuck, I had a long layover because cheaper so I didn't want to carry my food with me) adressed me like you would a child or a mentally challenged person (and it would still have been extremely impolite in those circumstances). I asked for directions to a passenger who pointed to a sign and said in French "it's written there". It was written in Dutch. That's why I was asking.

So yeah, Belgium and I are Donzo. Unless I have time to lose and want me some more damages again.

Man, FUCK the Brussels airport. For those of you who haven't been, take a shopping mall, and make it an airport. All the shittiness you're imagining is real. The weird converted hanger in Berlin was a better experience.

And what even are Belgians?

Not a travel story, but my favourite New York story: on my way to an 8:00am class, walking through a park with all the wage slaves, and this homeless guy lays out a newspaper over a storm drain - he proceeds to take a huge, steamy, strangely fibrous dump on it, rolls it up and drops it into a nearby trash can. He then goes on his merry way, three pounds lighter.

Actual travel story - Bratislava is always rainy and shitty and exactly like euro trip, except you can't buy a hotel for a nickel because they're on the euro and everything is actually kind of expensive.

From over Christmas - we rented a cabin in the northeast of the country (that doesn't matter) and on the balcony, there were these nice fur rugs. On the 26th we walk over to the cabin owners' main house (basically across the street) to give them some chili because we made a shitton. They invite us inside, and keep giving us this really strong plum liquor. Eventually we ask what the furs are. They're dog. Our whole cabin is filled with like 10 dead dogs. There's also a taxidermied owl with weirdly small eyes. At one point the old lady disappears for several minutes and brings my fiancé a rabbit fur. She talks about how they use a dead cat to keep their phone in place, and then we leave.

Disarm D'arcy wrote:I have a long post to type about Belgian airlines, Belgian passengers, Belgian airports, Belgians at the Belgian airports.

Belgian airlines: had 3 flights with them on my way and back and forth to Oslo. Not a single one on time. The last two just didn't happen because grossly idiotic company (delays three flights on the same night - yes night) for no apparent reason (later proven to be true because I got DAMAGES). Arrived home with about 20 hours of delay.

Belgian passengers: first flight going to Brussels from France, I had a dick in front of me who made it a point to recline his seat well into my knees. After me asking the flight attendent 3 times to ask him to at least set it above my knees, and flight attendent being fed up with him because every time he would recline back into my knees immediately after the flight attendant walked away. I also want to point that flight is just slightly longer than an hour. Also, the flight attendent was excellent, so you know that airline wasn't Belgian but British.

Belgian airports: anyone who has ever set a foot in Brussels airport knows.

Belgians and the Brussels airports: clerk at Travelex said to me when I tried negotiating a better rate "if you can't afford it, don't travel"; clerk at cheapest food place (which was still expensive as fuck, I had a long layover because cheaper so I didn't want to carry my food with me) adressed me like you would a child or a mentally challenged person (and it would still have been extremely impolite in those circumstances). I asked for directions to a passenger who pointed to a sign and said in French "it's written there". It was written in Dutch. That's why I was asking.

So yeah, Belgium and I are Donzo. Unless I have time to lose and want me some more damages again.

This is much more accurate.



And maybe this even.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ycRqiCLBGGU[/youtube]

I just drink their beer and try to avoid getting bitten.

fuzzonaut wrote:

I just saw that movie. It was pretty good.

I liked that movie too.

But yeah, travel stories.

A conversation I had in a store in India:

Me: "What is this thing?"
Him: "150 Rupees."
Me: "Fine, but, what is it, what do you use it for?"
Him: "Ok, 120 Rupees."
Me: "No, I mean, I just want to know what it does, please?"
Him: "Ok, special price 100 Rupees."
Me: "You don't understand a word I'm saying, right?"
Him: "Ok my friend, last price 80 Rupees."
Me: "Oh well, just forget it, thanks anyway."
Him: "60 Rupees!!!!"
Me: walks off.
Him: " 50 Rupees, my friend, 50 Rupees!!!!"

fuzzonaut wrote:I liked that movie too.

But yeah, travel stories.

A conversation I had in a store in India:

Me: "What is this thing?"
Him: "150 Rupees."
Me: "Fine, but, what is it, what do you use it for?"
Him: "Ok, 120 Rupees."
Me: "No, I mean, I just want to know what it does, please?"
Him: "Ok, special price 100 Rupees."
Me: "You don't understand a word I'm saying, right?"
Him: "Ok my friend, last price 80 Rupees."
Me: "Oh well, just forget it, thanks anyway."
Him: "60 Rupees!!!!"
Me: walks off.
Him: " 50 Rupees, my friend, 50 Rupees!!!!"

that's awesome!!!!!

way to haggle,

I tend to take a translator when I shop at the market in Huizhou, if I take the factory manager I get over charged for things,
Our translator can drive prices down
but once in a while they want me to walk away from what in reality is a crazy good deal

Because you don't understand the fun of haggling

monkeydancer wrote:Because you don't understand the fun of haggling

I hate haggling although I negotiate large award bids at work, I just want things to cost what they cost.

monkeydancer wrote:

Olin wrote:Got into a fight with a monkey in Malaysia one time. It stole my food and refused to give it back, and threw a bit of crust at me. Monkeys are wankers and I'll never forgive them.

Fucking monkeys. Monkeys chased me out of a restaurant in India once.

Birth of a username

Got assaulted by Taiwanese children at a massive, multi-level nerf complex in Taipei. Little assholes ganged up on me and ran me out.

Here's a travel (commuting) story:

In Seattle, on a packed metro bus underneath the city in a tunnel. I am sitting in the back across from a man who is quietly barking to himself. You can tell he isn't in control of it, but is aware and he is upset/embarrassed about it. Every now and then a loud bark comes out. A few rows in front of him are a group of black dudes acting super hard. They keep glancing back at this guy barking and laughing about it. A particularly loud bark erupts and one of the guys starts yelling at him QUIT FUCKING FAKING THIS FAKE ASS SHIT YOU FUCK and proceeds to say all sorts of horrible things to this guy who is even more upset and embarrassed. (everyone is starting to get really antsy and nervous) Another bark and then another stream of obscenities prompts a small suburban housewife woman to start yelling at the black guy "you can't treat people like that this man is sick, have some respect, etc etc." Black guy stands up and gets right in her face "BITCH I AM FROM MOTHERFUCKING DADE COUNTY MIAMI FLORIDA AND DON'T GIVE A SHIT WHAT YOU THINK." (guy still barking) A man immediately jumps up towards them "I AM A UNITED STATES MARINE AND YOU FUCKING CANNOT AND FUCKING WILL NOT SPEAK TO A WOMAN LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF ME." (guy still barking, passengers starting to panic, almost to the stop but it feels a million miles away) Miami Dade and the Marine square up, bumping chests and making faces, their friends holding them back (woman still screaming, guy still barking, passengers trying to get as far away as possible) when in the middle of it all another guy jumps into the middle of the aisle and starts singing "GOD BLESS AMAERICA, LAND THAT I LOVE, STAND BESISDE HER..." at the top of his lungs. The bus finally arrives and the doors open to deliver us to safety and freedom, all the bystanders streaming out in chaos. Then we all stand in silent shock, mouths-agape, as the doors close and the bus pulls away as if nothing had happened.