ilovefuzz.com

I am a radioactive beer that can post on the internet by seeping into a the computer of an astral being that has been imprisoned on planet earth. Were both kindof unhappy.

EDIT: OOooooooh, Beerhammer backstory, me likey.

pelliott wrote:Also I have the amazing superpower of jinxing any sports team whose team colors I am wearing at the time. I purposefully wore black and gold to make the Steelers lose the Super Bowl in 2011. Also, ff I buy your favorite player's jersey, watch out, his ACL is toast.

pffft. The Steelers lost that game because Aaron Rogers is fudging awesome.

Apparently, I have the ability to drink tequila like it's water and still be slightly drunk at 1:30 the next day.

I have the ability to sit still for long periods of time. I'm also pretty good at changing the mood of a room.

Additional: I have a super wide hearing range. Like from 30-17500 hz.

A lot of the time I feel like that crazy person that's hearing voices because I can hear all kinds of horribly loud sounds that no one else seems to notice. Case and point: the person's laptop next to me. His laptop is emitting a terribly loud high-pitched whine, if it wasn't in the "supersonic" frequencies I'm pretty sure the professor would ask him to shut it off because it is one loud goddamned ear-fucker

I can't say anything about it either or I'll sound crazy. "Excuse me, your laptop is emitting a sound that only I can hear and it's incredibly loud. Please turn your laptop off."

OMG ME TOO.

I'm just finishing a job in a bar kitchen which has made me good at ignoring those kinds of sounds being surrounded by a bunch of fans and refrigerators and whatnot.

But, I'm also the guy with the super noisy laptop.

ISN'T IT THE WORST? THEY SHOULD HAVE PSA'S FOR THIS SHIT.

pelliott wrote:I have the incredible power to short out sensitive street lights by walking near/under them. SERIOUSLY.

Dude, same here. Happens all the time.

This smily feels relevant now:

Oh, I remembered one more. My lips give off shocks like crazy. With almost every single contact. It's so bad that my girlfriend always touches our noses together before she kisses me to discharge the electricity.

jfrey wrote:Oh, I remembered one more. My lips give off shocks like crazy. With almost every single contact. It's so bad that my girlfriend always touches our noses together before she kisses me to discharge the electricity.

That's so adorable I just puked in my mouth a little bit.

i can eat an entire pizza

I do this regularly

spelling. and foreplay.

tuffteef wrote:i can eat an entire pizza

just the one? what size are we talking here?

Greenfuz wrote:

tuffteef wrote:i can eat an entire pizza

just the one? what size are we talking here?

nyc ninja turtle size pizza pie

I have a special connections with animals:

-cats will sit/stand on whatever is in front of me
-birds will have a poop party above wherever my car is parked