ilovefuzz.com

sonidero wrote:There is a lot of True Life in this here thread, and it's all us old guys... I struggled all year to completely stop drinkin and just keep falling into habits... Sometimes I'd go into the corner store and be back at home icing down a 6 pack and not even realize I'd bought it... I think it helps to have people around that are into other things so you can just get on with it but even that's not always good cause I usually never drank with them anyway... Ryan's got it right that Partying stopped in the teenage years and now it's just a problem... 20 years of habits are hard to break... for everyone...

That's pretty much it. People mistakenly think that quitting is as easy as just not doing it. But there's thousands of little habits and triggers that go into every addiction that needs to be snuffed out. Just because you finally broke yourself of the after dinner cigarette addiction doesn't mean you won't break down from the mid morning break one.

I had one friend who started smoking in high school. He came down here and smoked another 10 years. He FINALLY, after lots of attempts, quit smoking. And after five years of that, had 0 cravings.........until he went to stay with his parents for a week. Once he got back into his old stomping grounds, his body reacted like he never left....and like he never quit. All the cravings he had from high school years were there and he relapsed. Had to quit all over again when he came back. Totally crazy how the brain works.

im sorry if i came across
as life now being miserable
im happier now
than i ever thought was possible
or that i ever deserved
and i think AA is key
at least for something to do
and a place to go
other than get high or drunk
i spent alot of time there
and i know id be better off
if i went back
and i wouldnt be where i am now without those tools
i have a personal issue with suboxone
thinkin that noone will
accept me as actually sober
so that keeps me away
its stupid cause i know it would
be the best thing for me
i love anything that gives someone
another option besides
self destruction and misery
ayuaska,aa,na,tony robbins,skydiving
whatever
and no
its not as easy as just saying no
i havent done dope in a year
and i still got a junkies brain
you know what helps the most
THIS THREAD!!!!!!
i fuckin love you guys
how is that one fucking clump
of letters and words
on a computer screen
scratches every itch that i got
and dev
there will come a time
when youll know how to deal
with the ones you care about
without feelin like they will drag you down
i always gotta think wether im just
giving myself a way to get high
without taking responsibility for it
every trip to NYC is in question for me
why do i REALLY wanna go down there
if its because maybe ill get a bag if i feel like it
i just dont go at this point
but if my friends gettin married
i gotta do it
and just know to rat myself out when that shit comes up
as soon as i check to see if i got an extra $20bill on me
i put it in the gas tank and get the fuck out
and this^
well said
you go right back to where you left off
but with more anger cause you fucked up
'hey ill do a couple lines,fuck it,party"
nah
that aint how it works for me
fuck guys im sorry
i keep goin on and on
thats it
im definately not the expert
or sponsor material
i just happen to be going through this
right now
luvluv
ima listen in for a bit

Deltaphoenix wrote:Congratulations on white knuckling it for one year.
I have almost 4 years clean. In my experience finding a support network really helped (NA or AA). Life is way better with personal relationships with other positive people who are on the same path. There are very few "friends" that I miss from when I used because when I stopped, the foundation of our friendship was gone.
I have actually been in bands where every member was in recovery from addiction and it was awesome. A lot more got done at practice.

MSUsousaphone wrote:About to be the bitch that posts the "way easier said than done" shit. But you gotta get out, man. You need to get new friends around you. So many things that we get hooked on fall into the addiction model (relationships, food, PEDAL WHORING!!!!!) and they pretty much all have the same pitfall, that you were doing it to fill a need. And you HAVE to fill that need with something else or you will go back to the old habit to do it. No one has the ultimate will power. Every one of us would crack under consistent pressure, eventually. It's kinda like how you can't really get over someone until you've found a new person.

Again, all shit I know you've heard before and stuff that, if it were easy to do, would already be done. Maybe take what Deltz said and run with it. Music. See if you can start jamming with clean people. Maybe even people who are new clean like you. Start a recovery group with music as the center.

But big congrats on the year. That's nothing trivial. That's huge.

Yep, agree with a lot of stuff that's been said and the two above are really good.

It's making new memories time man. Your "friend" is a bad idea. Your longing has nothing do with him as much as being in a place that, for you, was comfortable. Deadly, but comfortable. Now that no one is around you're uncomfortable and that feeling can be uneasy. The good news is that you're feeling again. Hard to feel, emotionally, when using... Embrace feeling again, even the uncomfortable ones, they'll pass. Get out and do some new things and meet new people. Be patient and stay the course. It gets easier. And congrats!

Fuck dude.

I've lost my father and countless "friends" to heroin. Never even touched the stuff myself. I just smoke a little herb and drink some beers. I had a rough spell with some Adderall that was given to me by a "friend" that I was rocking out on for a few months, but I got my shit together and stopped.

I smoke cigs every now and then with no withdrawls or anything.

Idk what the point of this comment is other than I hope you can keep clean man. I've seen some talented and smart people drop dead.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0OSnAPxyMzo[/youtube]

this is your jam

You guys are champs. If I tried that stuff I'd never be able to stop.


I also have a question for you guys if you don't mind. It may a little juvenile, but I am quite curious.
Do you still smoke weed at all?

I've read different things people have written (on other sites), and some seem to say it isn't an issue for them, while others say it would just bring them back to where they were before.
What about you guys? What's your take on that?

I don't smoke weed. I have no desire to. I have made a commitment to live life on life's terms which means to experience life as naturally as possible without using anything as a crutch, I drink coffee and take aleve if I need to, things that don't really affect my mental/spiritual existance. I make no moral judgement on people that smoke weed or drink or whatever, just for me, if I smoked weed or drank, I would end up doing other drugs that are more destructive to me. I take things to the extremes in that realm (and many others).
When I tried the "Marijuan Maintenance Program" it failed miserably for me.

I still smoke weed occasionally

weed is the only drug
ive ever been afraid of
id take cocaine psychosis
over weed paranoia any day
i stay away from everything
"im just gonna_____"
always turns into
"eh,i might as well____"
i blew 3 1/2 yrs clean
cause i wanted a jack and coke
and i dont even like drinkin
6yrs later and strung to the gills
was it worth the risk, nah
i know plenty of 15-20yr marijuana maintinencers
i also know plenty of coke shooters
on the methadone line
that dont work for me
all or nothin
i keep myself away from the game
completely
not having anything
gives me no chance of wanting more
this is just me though

Fuzzy Picklez wrote:You guys are champs. If I tried that stuff I'd never be able to stop.


I also have a question for you guys if you don't mind. It may a little juvenile, but I am quite curious.
Do you still smoke weed at all?

I've read different things people have written (on other sites), and some seem to say it isn't an issue for them, while others say it would just bring them back to where they were before.
What about you guys? What's your take on that?

Haven't smoked in 3-4 years, before that quite regularly and almost daily at one point. For me it was a lot like being tipsy but without the risk of going over. And since it's legal around these parts it's cheaper than booze. It didn't affect me during the day when I was at work or wherever. I never felt like I NEEDED to smoke, if I ran out late at night I couldn't be bothered to go out and get it. If you're just bumming around watching whatever, maybe listening to music the stuff can be great. If you're trying to be productive ... not so much. I like myself better when I'm sober and the world better when I'm not, chose the lesser evil.

Good job, man. Takes a strong person to be able to get away from all that.

I'm trying now to get away from the regular drinking that I've been around recently, and find some people that are a bit more positive to be around. It's tough, and I can't imagine the work it's taken to get to where you're at now.

alexa. wrote:

D.o.S. wrote:

alexa. wrote:Have you heard about Ayahuasca treatments?

http://i1218.photobucket.com/albums/dd4 ... erious.gif

There is an African herbal mix similar to Aya (forgot the name), and they are using it in Africa to heal heroin addicts (the ones that look for help that is).

That would be Ibogain from Iboga.

On a related note, I'm off weed, gonna get off cigs, but achieve my mellow through extracted isolates from nervine herbs made into teas. And even the weed thing was hard for me, so MAJOR props to all you dudes who kicked that goddamn smack. I actually can't even grab an occasional 6 pack anymore, as it offsets a depressive states I don't need any help falling into. I'm gonna be checking back into this thread, I dig it.

Fuzzy Picklez wrote:You guys are champs. If I tried that stuff I'd never be able to stop.


I also have a question for you guys if you don't mind. It may a little juvenile, but I am quite curious.
Do you still smoke weed at all?

I've read different things people have written (on other sites), and some seem to say it isn't an issue for them, while others say it would just bring them back to where they were before.
What about you guys? What's your take on that?

I started the thread. My concern was that I was gonna visit my old party buddy and though I have been clean for at least a year I was gonna fall right back into use.

I did. I got over his house and he offered some kine bud and then I didn't feel normal stoned without a beer in my hand so I drank a few. Then some pills seemed quite the obvious next step, and about two hours later I fell asleep on his couch where his pitbull proceeded to push me off the couch. Then I drove home and had to keep only one eye open at a time because with both open I went cross eyed.

I feel bad for driving fucked up, and the next day I was totally hungover and felt really stupid. In fact it took me about three days before my mind cleared up totally.

Now I know. I can't hang with my old party buddies.

this is a real question
dude i idont judge anyone
EVER
if you could peek into my life
youd see some behaviors
that are questionable
so
did you know you were gonna get high?
honestly
did you have the "maybe a little herb"
before you went
or was your brain clear
that you definately werent gettin fucked up
before you went
and the one eye thing
how i didnt plow someone
on the taconic i dont know
drivin with one tiny little slit of an eye open
to avoid the double googles
well dude
dont beat yourself up
but dont go back in the shit
just cause you smoked
and took a few pills
you still have a choice
all i can say is choose wisely
and remember
there is no in between
one night of weed and pills will
only do it for so long
before that beast wants to feed
that shits just pokin it with a stick
remember that bathroom stall
we were talkin bout
im one bag away from it as well homey
dont sweat it though kid
luvluv