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Bellyheart wrote:It's not a huge deal. Just say youre not feeling it.

Chankgeez wrote:Well, I'm always for giving 'em the honest truth if they're mature enough to handle it. Seems these guys (or at least that one guy) aren't.

Bassus Sanguinis wrote:Simply tell them that You're sorry but You're at the moment excited about something completely different and You'll be concentrating on it, so sorry guys but You just can't compete with this one.

And that's it. You can also say that You can't be bothered with their material, if some band member insists You rub it in. Sometimes they do, because they want to make a number of anybody leaving their superb band.

Perfect advice.

If the lead guy is a petty prick, you shouldn't care about him anyway. It's not like down the line he'll give you any revelations.

I'm the "dickhead" in my band, the one who's the most "emotional" abut things, and I wouldn't say a damn word about Tommy or Conor that did not reflect their genius if they chose to bail. There's plenty of twats who hate the shit out of me because I couldn't be bothered playing their lame jams anymore, and none of them are even playing out in the 5 years since I bailed.

Stop worrying, instead get shit done.

Let the bassist know you like him. Come up with something more exciting for yourself, don't relegate the duty of someone else's happiness above your own. You're not a vessel for someone else's buzz.

Adoom wrote:

Bellyheart wrote:It's not a huge deal. Just say youre not feeling it.

Chankgeez wrote:Well, I'm always for giving 'em the honest truth if they're mature enough to handle it. Seems these guys (or at least that one guy) aren't.

Bassus Sanguinis wrote:Simply tell them that You're sorry but You're at the moment excited about something completely different and You'll be concentrating on it, so sorry guys but You just can't compete with this one.

And that's it. You can also say that You can't be bothered with their material, if some band member insists You rub it in. Sometimes they do, because they want to make a number of anybody leaving their superb band.

Perfect advice.

If the lead guy is a petty prick, you shouldn't care about him anyway. It's not like down the line he'll give you any revelations.

I'm the "dickhead" in my band, the one who's the most "emotional" abut things, and I wouldn't say a damn word about Tommy or Conor that did not reflect their genius if they chose to bail. There's plenty of twats who hate the shit out of me because I couldn't be bothered playing their lame jams anymore, and none of them are even playing out in the 5 years since I bailed.

Stop worrying, instead get shit done.

Let the bassist know you like him. Come up with something more exciting for yourself, don't relegate the duty of someone else's happiness above your own. You're not a vessel for someone else's buzz.

Wow, man. Thanks a lot. I think that's sort of what I needed to hear. I don't owe this guy shit, I'm helping him out and it's costing me money plus I don't get as much out of it a I have in other projects.

mattar wrote: So, what do? Also he records guitar by plugins direct from guitar ino GarageBand....

Take a shit on his keyboard.

Claim responsibility for it, and he'll most likely tell you to get lost.

No guilty feelings on your end

naw, but all you really gotta do is be up front and say you're not digging it. Period.

This stuff happens all the time. By the time I had to do it with my (4th band I think) it became second nature. I wasn't a dick about it, just said I wasn't into it.

yeah when i quit my doom band i went for a drink and just said 'sorry dudes, i'm out'

and that was it

Chankgeez wrote:Don't go to practice & don't return any of their calls/texts/emails?

You could also try being a grown up. Tell your band at the next time you get together what you told us.

"I cant do this anymore because
X
Y
Z
Sorry, dudes, bye."

aen wrote:

Chankgeez wrote:Don't go to practice & don't return any of their calls/texts/emails?

You could also try being a grown up. Tell your band at the next time you get together what you told us.

"I cant do this anymore because
X
Y
Z
Sorry, dudes, bye."

Well it's between this and shitting on his keyboard, they both are about tied in the respectable approach category.

Go on tour and make sure you have plenty of speed in your luggage as you go through customs.
They'll kick you out when you get busted. And you'll make lots of new friends in jail too...
Bet you've always wanted eyeball tattoos.

devnulljp wrote:Go on tour and make sure you have plenty of speed in your luggage as you go through customs.
They'll kick you out when you get busted. And you'll make lots of new friends in jail too...
Bet you've always wanted eyeball tattoos.

This is the kind of creative problem solving I needed.

Gozu wrote:yeah when i quit my doom band i went for a drink and just said 'sorry dudes, i'm out'

and that was it

Now that's how these situations should be handled. On both sides. And if band mates actually discuss stuff and motives, these situations hardly ever come as a total surprise.

Also, usually it's considered very polite if You offer to fill in before a new recruit is found, if You can stretch Yourself some more. In this case, I don't think so. But can You perhaps think about anybody who might be interested to take up Your responsibilities in the band?

It by no means necessary, it's just a real nice thing to do, if band chemistry is right and there's no hard feelings from either side. And it never hurts to have a good word for You from Your ex band mates.

fake your own death?




the one thing I'd suggest is don't do it by text. Seems a little rude. But yeah, just be straight up, if they're dicks about it it's their problem.

aen wrote:

Chankgeez wrote:Don't go to practice & don't return any of their calls/texts/emails?

You could also try being a grown up. Tell your band at the next time you get together what you told us.

"I cant do this anymore because
X
Y
Z
Sorry, dudes, bye."

I completely agree with this, but as an alternative:

Start showing up to practice with an alligator.

McSpunckle wrote:

aen wrote:

Chankgeez wrote:Don't go to practice & don't return any of their calls/texts/emails?

You could also try being a grown up. Tell your band at the next time you get together what you told us.

"I cant do this anymore because
X
Y
Z
Sorry, dudes, bye."

I completely agree with this, but as an alternative:

Start showing up to practice with an alligator.

Yeah, that's what I meant.

Bassus Sanguinis wrote:

Gozu wrote:yeah when i quit my doom band i went for a drink and just said 'sorry dudes, i'm out'

and that was it

Also, usually it's considered very polite if You offer to fill in before a new recruit is found, if You can stretch Yourself some more. In this case, I don't think so. But can You perhaps think about anybody who might be interested to take up Your responsibilities in the band?

McSpunckle wrote:
I completely agree with this, but as an alternative:

Start showing up to practice with an alligator.

Show up to practice with an alligator replacement, gotcha. I live in florida so this shouldn't be too hard.

In all seriousness, I usually show up to practice without an instrument, tell them I'm quitting and if I can figure out a way to be complimentary to the band members who aren't the reason I'm quitting, I give them encouragement, saying nothing to or about the people who are the reason I'm quitting.