neonblack wrote:Holy shit, I am DEPRESSED.
I barely have the energy to type out why, but mostly it's that I've wasted the last decade of my life.
Next year I will have outlived my father. His birthday was today. He would have been 53 but he died 20 years ago. I was mad at him for a really long time, but the older I get and the harder things get, I totally get it. Not that I want to go down the same road, because I have my son and I care about him more than anything, but holy shit. I get it.
You didn’t waste shit. You had a bunch of experiences, a kid, survived, made music, had friends, shitposted on ILF...
I’m in that spot where I see why people want out, too. I don’t seriously consider it, but those thoughts pop into my head. Then I read about old people who insist that happiness is a choice, not circumstantial. Then I realize that happiness and depression aren’t really on the same continuum.
You’re probably in a position to help some other people out. Become an old man. Pass your wisdom on. You already beat your dad’s high score...keep racking up points as a ‘fuck you’ to painful experiences. Spite will carry you far!