This needs a thread of it's own!(Hitler+KLON+ILF=LOL's)

[Holy Schnikes]

I made my girl sit through it, that's how hilarious I found this vid!

She doesn't know shit about no Klons and she was busting up.

[quarterpound]

there should be a Walter Fuzz.

lol, there should be a Wattson Walter Fizzle. it can be a really fizzy fuzz for those people who like to sound like a 1970s tv tuned to a UHF channel showing a show about what happens when you let go of balloons.

[dubkitty]

thanks for all you doods for being my rock. YOU GUYZ HELPED ME.

to the extent i helped, i'm happy. this is THE best and most supportive online community i've ever been part of. helping is what ILFers DO

[echodeluxe]

seriously, its pretty nuts. <3 u doods

[Holy Schnikes]

for fun, his initial pm to me:

Dude, i initially posted in your thread to try to help you sell the pedal and support your sale of the pedal. If you posting it for sale was a joke on your part, then the jokes on me. But i defend myself against those ridiculing my opinions, views and gear and you threaten me with sending a detonating jar of cum to my house? Tell you what. I happen to like your pedals and i believe we can talk man to man. Here's my no. ***-***-****. Call me anytime you'd like and we'll clear the air between each other. Whatever the fucking 'bro-hood' here is like, i don't care. But call me that way you can understand me better and I for you. Please don't post my personal no. online. Walter

my response:

haha dude that was a joke. i dont care what you say in that thread.

to behonest, when i posted the post about the exploding cum, i thought you were joking up to that point. were you being serious the entire time?

yeesh. look, dont take those guys or anything else seriously. i posted the klon because i really am trying to sell it, but it has become a ridiculous thread. but i just assumed it was all jokes.

cuz im not serious at all. sorry if i offended!

here is where it gets fun:

Hey dude, When I see the words 'mail', 'mason jar' and 'detonate' all in the same sentence, I consider that a serious threat. From reading my posts you'd know I live in NYC and neither I nor anyone else I know here would take what you said lightly, especially given the fact that you work in an electronics device facility. That's why I asked you to call me. Your 'bro bonding' threat post to me was taken seriously enough for me to make an appointment with my local FBI office in Manhattan tomorrow afternoon with a copy of the entire thread in hand. If you read the entire thread you'd realize that not only did I defend myself against the jabs, et al. stones, thrown at me in a non-threatening way, I also supported you and encouraged others to try the pedal you posted for sale because A - I believe it's a good product and B - I wanted to help get your asking price for it. I would like your threatening post removed and an appropiate apology in it's place by 12 pm tomorrow afternoon. Walter

and so i got pissed and said:

ok i think we need to take a breather, step back and relax. i said im sorry already, and i have made it abundantly clear that i was joking. not only do i NOT know how to make a bomb, i dont have the money to procure anything to do so! im a broke pedal builder. i can make fuzz pedals, but anything else no way.

also, it is 100% obvious that it was a joke. who would send someone a bottle of exploding cum? i mean, honestly?! you are taking that as a serious threat? especially since i dont know who you are or where you live? i mean, new york obviously but am i just gonna send a package of cum labeled "new york" and hope you happen across it?

i am really taken aback at your hot headed approach to this entire thread AND my obvious joking comment. this is why america sucks. this is why the nsa is looking at our every email and text message. crazed lunatic conspiracy theorists like yourself who take benign comments on a messageboard as a real threat. dude, i am no more a threat to you than a piece of lint in the bellybutton of Tom Hanks. even if i was serious (i was 100% NOT SERIOUS) i dont have the time or resources to fill up a mason jar with cum, learn and purchase the stuff i need to make it explode on you, or, gee i dont know, FIGURE OUT WHERE THE FUCK YOU LIVE.

go ahead and waste the FBI's precious time and resources with your insane vendetta. i really hope you reconsider. especially since this is a huge waste of time on your part. ill get to laugh with my local FBI field agents about how much of a hothead reactionary you are. im pretty sure youll most likely get laughed out of the manhattan office anyway. i mean, save what little face you got and just drop it. you were made to look a fool publicly in a forum (who cares?!) and this isnt the way to make yourself look any better. just drop it.

then i talked to him on the phone. he said he was gonna sue me, take all of my possessions, get his buddies to hurt me, that im gonna feel the pain, that hes gonna make me cry, and some other insane stuff.

i called the FBI office he supposedly went to and the agent said in so many words:

if someone came in here with that, we would laugh them out of here and throw their papers in the shredder. we get whackos like that all the time. we dont have time to deal with those idiots. you dont have anything to worry about."

so, i know the fbi doesnt care.

he called me again, and i told him i talked to the fbi office. he went nuts, saying hes gonna sue me, im gonna regret being born, hes gonna do all this stuff, etc etc.

so, yeah. for all of those who didnt see it.

HAHAHAHA, wow! Who knew selling your buddy's Klon would lead to this awesomeness, unreal!

[echodeluxe]

yeah no kidding.

im thinking about adapting it into a screenplay.

[behndy]

that takes on a whole new level of awesome meaning imaging that coming from your avatar.

[echodeluxe]

ill be honest, guys. i invented this "Walter" character to make me seem like the victim all so i could convince behndy to hold me close.

[fiddelerselbow]

What a fucking prick. Shit I hope the guy calls you again, just to see him end up in court.

[JuJo]

Okay, so you didn't manage to sell your Klon, and Walter didn't turn out to be such a bro, but at least there's a couple good things to take from this. Obviously the video is hilarious.

also:

am i just gonna send a package of cum labeled "new york" and hope you happen across it?

I literally LOL'd at this one. I love the premise, think I might start filling a jar now... Or at the very least start writing a screenplay for a short film about a poor lost jar of cum and his misadventures after waking up in New York with no real idea of how he got there, only to detonate upon realization of his life's mission.

and:

I do believe you mean this...

This really made my day. It was the last thing I saw in that thread and I was afraid it was gone forever.

Also, don't spend any time worrying about this dude paying you a visit or causing you any grief, he's just another idiot on the internet who's inflated ego was damaged when someone didn't agree that he (or his tone) was better than everyone else.

[AxAxSxS]

I think it's hilarious he was so pissed about the cables comments. Truth hurts? Actually only for display/e-peen?

[echodeluxe]

dude he wouldnt let the cable shit go. on the phone he kept bringing it up saying he was defending himself.

he was like "fuck those guys for not believing i have cables! i have more cables then theyve seen!"


hahahahaha what a fucking cunt.

[dubkitty]

cables

the next time i have to buy patch cables the people at the shop aren't going to understand why i'm giggling, and it will be impossible to explain.

[Deltaphoenix]

dude he wouldnt let the cable shit go. on the phone he kept bringing it up saying he was defending himself.

he was like "fuck those guys for not believing i have cables! i have more cables then theyve seen!"


hahahahaha what a fucking cunt.

IDK...I have seen a lot of cables in my day.

[dubkitty]

you can
eat yo' bacon, eat yo'
pork and beans
i gots mo' cables
any man ever seen
I AM
A CABLE MAN
well, the men don't know
but little Filter
under-STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANDS