Soy Boyz 2: Eclectic Boobaloo



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Re: Soy Boyz 2 Men

Postby BetterOffShred » Thu Jan 25, 2018 6:04 pm

calfzilla wrote:Well, I'm finally caught up on this and...
1. If you use any sort of "sensation" product and a lady shivers due to the light breeze of a fan, a quick breath to the contact site is hilarious but ill-advised
2. Has anyone been on a date so terrible, you make up something horrid like "oh shit my buddy just texted me, he's suicidal over a breakup, I better go"? Or am I the worst person here?

Like Icy hot?

Yeah I've had a couple where I wanted to go to the bathroom, bounce out a window, and then phone it in..
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Re: Soy Boyz 2 Men

Postby popvulture » Thu Jan 25, 2018 6:05 pm

$harkToootth wrote:
JonnyAngle wrote:
$harkToootth wrote:Me too, minus the married part.

The two smoothest dudes on this side of the misssissippi.

One...Hundred...Percent :hug:
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There needs to be a band called Smoothest Dudes.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JphJfwsUbT4
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Re: Soy Boyz 2 Men

Postby calfzilla » Fri Jan 26, 2018 9:40 am

BetterOffShred wrote:
calfzilla wrote:Well, I'm finally caught up on this and...
1. If you use any sort of "sensation" product and a lady shivers due to the light breeze of a fan, a quick breath to the contact site is hilarious but ill-advised
2. Has anyone been on a date so terrible, you make up something horrid like "oh shit my buddy just texted me, he's suicidal over a breakup, I better go"? Or am I the worst person here?

Like Icy hot?

Yeah I've had a couple where I wanted to go to the bathroom, bounce out a window, and then phone it in..

Whatever the KY equivalent of Icy hot is, yeah. It was exactly that. I laughed my ass off. She was not amused.

@Popvulture - Would the smoothest dudes play surf rock or slide?
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby neonblack » Fri Jan 26, 2018 9:51 am

Chillwave
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby Chankgeez » Fri Jan 26, 2018 10:02 am

mmm, you're makin' me tempeh hambre. :snax:
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby comesect2.0 » Fri Jan 26, 2018 11:26 am

^^...stay away from condoms with ice on one side and hot on the other....the inside was hot, so my dick caught on fire ..and she was like wtf my pussy feels weird and not chillwave at all, my wang turned red, so I sent an email to trojan talkin bout unclaimed dreams or someshit and they sent coupons...those lamb skin trojan condoms are made from sheep intestines and those take you back in time...
play slide on a water bed
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COMESECT SMELT XYANA
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby gnomethrone » Fri Jan 26, 2018 1:24 pm

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lost in music wrote:Drop out of life with cone in hand. Follow the scoops to-ah the ice cream man.


good dealings here:
NSFW: show
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby $harkToootth » Fri Jan 26, 2018 1:27 pm

My typical Friday night...
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Don't do me ugly...
Oh Lord! The streets took you Blaze! Didn't I tell you!
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby calfzilla » Fri Jan 26, 2018 1:34 pm

$harkToootth wrote:My typical Friday night...
Image

This raises the question... How did Hannibal change his name and become a Highway Patrol Captain?
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby Achtane » Thu Feb 08, 2018 6:00 pm

Last night.
Doin' stuff.
How to Get Away with Murder is on TV. It gets to a scene where a woman stabs herself in the neck and now she's convulsing on the floor while gurgling and a child is crying "mama!".
Oh god.
The gurgling continues.
Against the nature of someone who's been traversing the hell-pits of the Internet since age 10, this background noise is really starting to affect my, uh, turgidity. And I got turned on by the disembodied head rape scene in Reanimator.
The gurgling continues. It's really loud.
I looked. Fuck, why'd I look? Now my junk feels like it's going numb. She can tell, right? I'm sure she can tell. In a few moments it's gonna be like I'm flopping a half-empty water balloon against her. This is horrible. My confidence is gonna be shot, I'm gonna wish I was dead in a minute.

Time out.
Browse Netflix for a second and just click on whatever. The Smurfs movie. Whatever.
Proceed as originally planned.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Louy7zH9guw
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby Invisible Man » Thu Feb 08, 2018 11:44 pm

Something something blue balls.
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby neonblack » Fri Feb 09, 2018 9:19 am

I miss the touch of a woman. And boobs.
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby imJonWain » Fri Feb 09, 2018 10:01 pm

don't we all. What happened to all the luck you had a few months back?
Thats hella tight dude


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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby The Eristic » Sat Feb 10, 2018 1:12 am

Invisible Man wrote:Something something blue balls.


Oh man, the violin teacher at the store where I teach is the fucking *worst*. Like, she's done it so frequently I should know better than to even bother, but... but it's so close to going down this time, surely she won't bail at the last second again? Oh wait yes she will. :cry: :cry: :cry:
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Re: Tempeh Hombre and his Smoothest Dudes

Postby neonblack » Sat Feb 10, 2018 11:24 am

imJonWain wrote:don't we all. What happened to all the luck you had a few months back?


Not sure. Stress + depression + drinking + eating like shit + no money = not exactly killin it
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