The spite, hate, rage, apathy and mild irritation thread...

[friendship]

I took the first week of the year off of work and really took care of myself. Cooked and ate healthy food, set a strict bedtime and got plenty of rest, started lifting weights again, avoided alcohol, indulged in creativity in a relaxed way. I thought to myself, "this is a good start." By day two back at work every last one of those good practices has vanished.

[Olin]

Tried not using anything to get to sleep today and ended up excessively heavy, angry and unhappy with the way things are, so gave up. I'm realising more and more that this isn't a healthy/acceptable way to live, but the other way always ends up being more damaging so I don't know how fair that really is.
I just want to sleep without dreams and not wake up for a while. Sounds like a stupid angst-fuelled, edgy 16 year old thing to say but I'm getting really sick of waking up these days and if there was an option to just drop into a coma without brain damage for a month or two I'd love to do that.

[friendship]

Tried not using anything to get to sleep today and ended up excessively heavy, angry and unhappy with the way things are, so gave up. I'm realising more and more that this isn't a healthy/acceptable way to live, but the other way always ends up being more damaging so I don't know how fair that really is.
I just want to sleep without dreams and not wake up for a while. Sounds like a stupid angst-fuelled, edgy 16 year old thing to say but I'm getting really sick of waking up these days and if there was an option to just drop into a coma without brain damage for a month or two I'd love to do that.

I know this feel

[codetocontra]

if there was an option to just drop into a coma without brain damage for a month or two I'd love to do that.

Sign me up for cryostasis.

[comesect2.0]

Soup soup soup, money money money, life & death life & death, lonsum lonsum lonsum, spiritually refined insurgent of despair, read two books in 6 days and grow nose hair, how loathsome how incredibly loathsome reality is ..in faith and humility offer up a prayer for the dead, let it come that I may liberate all who see, or hear me...a roaring savage beast! Penny in a bucket, fill up the bucket!

[comesect2.0]

Well it's official, I have no longer the capability to move my small toe after breaking? it in November...weird when you want a part of your body to move but it can not...was hoping for the best but just like everything on my left side, it shall be the death of me. Whole foot was numb for 2 months, everyone said go to doctor.."yeah ..sure..you pay for it...no insurance." Thought it was all my heel spurs coming back at once...idk what happened, but some serious nerve damage..still a numb feeling...little finger won't bend from an "injury" 5 yrs ago and now me little toe won't move, all on left side...grrr

[Olin]

Woke up after some night terrors. Always such a disgusting feeling.
Going to spend the day benz'd out of my mind in the shower.

[actual]

Room for two in there?

[Olin]

Wanna come take a ton of diazepam, drink a bunch of vodka and sit on the shower floor watching random It's Always Sunny episodes until the water goes cold?

[actual]

Sure, that's what I was planning on doing anyway.

[Olin]

See you in the kingdom, bredda.

[Pepe]

everyone said go to doctor.."yeah ..sure..you pay for it...no insurance."

This always makes me mad to hear! Can it be that you are all living in the ONE 1st world country that doesn't have health insurance for everyone?

[frodog]

I'm starting to think the drummer in our band is secretly a douche. He doesn't pick up the phone anymore since he got this new, square girlfriend, and we haven't played in months. Meanwhile, I am stuck being the therapist of his ex, whom he unceremoniously dumped for reasons I cannot fathom, basically stringing her along for ages because he's afraid of any type of confrontation. Hearing her stories it's clear he wasn't abusive, just really bad at communicating and being there for her in general. And I'm starting to see the same tendencies in his role in the band. Now he's done a complete turn towards adultness and treats his new girl great, while completely ignoring everyone else. Add to this that he doesn't give a shit about the band or even his own skills (never practices or evolves) and I'm at the end of my rope, about to say "fuck you, drum machines exist for a reason."

[$harkToootth]

Room for two in there?

Make it three.

[dubkitty]

i'll just sit outside the shower with a handful of benzos if that's all right with you. fuckin' psychiatrist HAD to discontinue them