The Confessions Thread



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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Sun Aug 18, 2019 10:10 pm

Corey Y wrote:I haven't posted in 6 months, because the day after the last post I made I came out as nonbinary transgender. Since then I haven't hardly played any music (a few times) and I've just been dealing with the fallout and everything surround coming out and also being unemployed and a stay at home parent. It's been pretty intense and brain frying, I feel like I haven't had relaxing day off in 6 months. I really miss playing music and want to jam with people again, but the social awkwardness that comes with this phase of my life is keeping from feeling comfortable reaching out to new people I don't know.

I meant to reach out to you while I was on sabitical but wanted to give you time and space. I think you did an incredibly brave thing, and couldn’t even fathom the courage it takes to continue facing your days. You posted this back in December of 2018 so I’m not sure what may or may not have happened since then. I sincerely hope your life has become more comfortable.

Not pressuring you to post, or pm me (I mean, I know I didn’t do that for you but that was not me being evasive, I’m just a big believer in giving people ‘space’ and ‘time’). You’ll always be my banter sibling here.

This next part probably sounds like you could find on a plywood sign from Pier One for 20% off but I truly believe this and in my times of doubt come back to it. “Being brave is not being scared... you are scared but you go through with it anyway.”

I also, secretly hope when you came out, you told people to “Take or bake it party mango!”

Hope it’s going better my friend (and I know we never met in person but, we are friends). Hit me up if you want someone to listen / or read any thoughts.

Oh... no matter what. If you are still fried, or in a better place. You should start playing music again. I hope you have already.
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Fri Sep 06, 2019 9:55 am

Not really a confession. Just a goof being a goof.
I have a 2008 black macbook I still rock. A couple months ago, at least three but probably more, I took a little too much kratom, and I like to take zinc and gaba before bed, and decided to barf all over the keyboard. Keys C through ? did not work along with a couple others. No big deal, I have a nice agronomic keyboard I use for work, I can just plug that in whenever I use it. Well... yesterday when I was checking out online, after purchasing some music, I accidentally hit the C AND IT WORKED!

A history of the maintenance on my 2008 Macbook. 2008 -> 2013 = Zip, Nadda, Squat. 2013 = I was buying a vinyl of the CRUISING soundtrack online and dropped it while it was open. Usually no big deal but this time it landed screen first. Went to the apple store and got the screen replaced. I remember this because they sat me down the way a doctor would when suggesting a loved one needs to go to hospice. "This is already an old computer and the repairs is $250. Do you really want to go through with this." Uhhh... yeah.... They made a point to ask, "Do I really think the computer would last five more years?" Totally beating their expectations! 2014 -> Added more RAM (6GB, not officially supported but works) and updated the OS. That's it. Three things. The fourth thing magically fixed itself.

I will never smack talk Pre-Obama Apple Products again. This thing won't die!
"SWIPE LEFT ASSHOLE!" -retinal orbita
"Whatever ASSHOLE here’s my pedal that makes humpback whale noises and also it has a built in sequencer so stick it in your craw! -retinal orbita
"Patty Mullen takes me from a ball peen to a sledge" -The Great Velvet Hammer
"...at this exact moment Divine has learned of your jealous scheme from the local town gossip. She also has your address, ASS HOLE!" -Narrator (Mr. J) PINK FLAMINGOS
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby Mudfuzz » Fri Sep 06, 2019 10:01 am

$harkToootth wrote:I will never smack talk Pre-Obama Apple Products again. This thing won't die!

I still have my G4.. it still works perfectly :thumb: all my post 09 apples have taken hard rive dumps of one kind or another...
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Fri Sep 06, 2019 10:19 am

Actually, my 2014 iPad is still going strong. I try not to do any iOS updates though cause... the last time they did that, it screwed up how I watch youtube in chrome and run other apps (it added like, 2 extra steps but that is enough to make me pissy :lol: )
This picture of my Apple Products also accurately sums up my DIY skills.
Image

Here are my mods
1. On the iPad, if you buy the wrong size case, just break some of it off and tape it in. Case closed (pun intended)
2. On the laptop, tap over the camera and blinking light. I might feel sassy and upgrade the tape to black guerrilla tape. We'll have to see though.
"SWIPE LEFT ASSHOLE!" -retinal orbita
"Whatever ASSHOLE here’s my pedal that makes humpback whale noises and also it has a built in sequencer so stick it in your craw! -retinal orbita
"Patty Mullen takes me from a ball peen to a sledge" -The Great Velvet Hammer
"...at this exact moment Divine has learned of your jealous scheme from the local town gossip. She also has your address, ASS HOLE!" -Narrator (Mr. J) PINK FLAMINGOS
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Sun Sep 08, 2019 11:55 pm

I cut a 7 second long fart in front of my Grandma a couple weeks ago and she shed a tear she was so proud of me. Some of my Uncles texted me later expressing how proud they were of me. This fart is now my crowning achievement in their eyes.
"SWIPE LEFT ASSHOLE!" -retinal orbita
"Whatever ASSHOLE here’s my pedal that makes humpback whale noises and also it has a built in sequencer so stick it in your craw! -retinal orbita
"Patty Mullen takes me from a ball peen to a sledge" -The Great Velvet Hammer
"...at this exact moment Divine has learned of your jealous scheme from the local town gossip. She also has your address, ASS HOLE!" -Narrator (Mr. J) PINK FLAMINGOS
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby Eivind August » Mon Sep 09, 2019 9:07 am

$harkToootth wrote:I cut a 7 second long fart in front of my Grandma a couple weeks ago and she shed a tear she was so proud of me. Some of my Uncles texted me later expressing how proud they were of me. This fart is now my crowning achievement in their eyes.

I am glad to have you back on here. :hug:
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby Chankgeez » Mon Sep 09, 2019 9:29 am

:!!!: :lol: :doom:
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Sweet dealin's: here
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Sun Sep 15, 2019 10:24 pm

Apparently my new bit is, while sitting and watching Smosh Pit on YouTube, sticking my hands down my pants and just ripping off gootch and inner thigh hairs, and throwing them on the ground.

It doesn’t feel great tbh. Gunna have to vacuum tomorrow too. :idk:
"SWIPE LEFT ASSHOLE!" -retinal orbita
"Whatever ASSHOLE here’s my pedal that makes humpback whale noises and also it has a built in sequencer so stick it in your craw! -retinal orbita
"Patty Mullen takes me from a ball peen to a sledge" -The Great Velvet Hammer
"...at this exact moment Divine has learned of your jealous scheme from the local town gossip. She also has your address, ASS HOLE!" -Narrator (Mr. J) PINK FLAMINGOS
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Mon Sep 16, 2019 5:58 pm

So no one else is ripping out their gooch and inner thigh hairs for fun? Can't say it's great. Just curious.
"SWIPE LEFT ASSHOLE!" -retinal orbita
"Whatever ASSHOLE here’s my pedal that makes humpback whale noises and also it has a built in sequencer so stick it in your craw! -retinal orbita
"Patty Mullen takes me from a ball peen to a sledge" -The Great Velvet Hammer
"...at this exact moment Divine has learned of your jealous scheme from the local town gossip. She also has your address, ASS HOLE!" -Narrator (Mr. J) PINK FLAMINGOS
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Mon Sep 16, 2019 9:32 pm

Okay, so the other day I was just being the rock and roller that I am, and I opted to eat some shredded pork that was WAY BEYOND its expiration date. Life Hack people, old pork is just poor man’s kimchi. Everybody knows this. Case closed. 100%. So after I got my budget probiotic in my system, I was killing time to see if I was going to get some food poisoning but... I started farting. Farting is your body’s way of telling you “You whooped them again Josie! No food poisoning.” So after gloating in my defeat, I keep ripping farts but... I can usually stand my own brand but these were SO BAD, I got a headache. It was like being in kindergarten and being around those scented markers a little too long. Or using too much hand sanitizer.

Anyway... not good. Really stunk and I got a headache. 100% would do it again though.

The farts were like, the volca beats bass drum on the lowest pitch with the decay all the way up. You know what I’m talking about.
"SWIPE LEFT ASSHOLE!" -retinal orbita
"Whatever ASSHOLE here’s my pedal that makes humpback whale noises and also it has a built in sequencer so stick it in your craw! -retinal orbita
"Patty Mullen takes me from a ball peen to a sledge" -The Great Velvet Hammer
"...at this exact moment Divine has learned of your jealous scheme from the local town gossip. She also has your address, ASS HOLE!" -Narrator (Mr. J) PINK FLAMINGOS
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby JonnyAngle » Tue Sep 17, 2019 12:34 am

$harkToootth wrote:Okay, so the other day I was just being the rock and roller that I am, and I opted to eat some shredded pork that was WAY BEYOND its expiration date. Life Hack people, old pork is just poor man’s kimchi. Everybody knows this. Case closed. 100%. So after I got my budget probiotic in my system, I was killing time to see if I was going to get some food poisoning but... I started farting. Farting is your body’s way of telling you “You whooped them again Josie! No food poisoning.” So after gloating in my defeat, I keep ripping farts but... I can usually stand my own brand but these were SO BAD, I got a headache. It was like being in kindergarten and being around those scented markers a little too long. Or using too much hand sanitizer.

Anyway... not good. Really stunk and I got a headache. 100% would do it again though.

The farts were like, the volca beats bass drum on the lowest pitch with the decay all the way up. You know what I’m talking about.

Can you change position mid fart to add the motion sequence?
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Tue Sep 17, 2019 8:08 am

Yes, some days it’s like a trap beat and your tuning those Tom drums up higher as you rapid fire.
Volca Arby’s
"SWIPE LEFT ASSHOLE!" -retinal orbita
"Whatever ASSHOLE here’s my pedal that makes humpback whale noises and also it has a built in sequencer so stick it in your craw! -retinal orbita
"Patty Mullen takes me from a ball peen to a sledge" -The Great Velvet Hammer
"...at this exact moment Divine has learned of your jealous scheme from the local town gossip. She also has your address, ASS HOLE!" -Narrator (Mr. J) PINK FLAMINGOS
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Tue Sep 24, 2019 7:17 pm

Been watching a lot of SMOTH PIT lately. Don't feel good about it. I can feel the days waste away.
"SWIPE LEFT ASSHOLE!" -retinal orbita
"Whatever ASSHOLE here’s my pedal that makes humpback whale noises and also it has a built in sequencer so stick it in your craw! -retinal orbita
"Patty Mullen takes me from a ball peen to a sledge" -The Great Velvet Hammer
"...at this exact moment Divine has learned of your jealous scheme from the local town gossip. She also has your address, ASS HOLE!" -Narrator (Mr. J) PINK FLAMINGOS
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby $harkToootth » Tue Sep 24, 2019 8:55 pm

It gets worse... I can't wait for this to come out!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZywVlyogLYM
"SWIPE LEFT ASSHOLE!" -retinal orbita
"Whatever ASSHOLE here’s my pedal that makes humpback whale noises and also it has a built in sequencer so stick it in your craw! -retinal orbita
"Patty Mullen takes me from a ball peen to a sledge" -The Great Velvet Hammer
"...at this exact moment Divine has learned of your jealous scheme from the local town gossip. She also has your address, ASS HOLE!" -Narrator (Mr. J) PINK FLAMINGOS
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Re: The Confessions Thread

Postby jrfox92 » Wed Sep 25, 2019 12:57 pm

...same.
Shane Dawson is this weird youtube guilty pleasure. Even though I'm entirely uninterested in pretty much everything that he does videos on, they still manage to be captivating.
Since I always forget:

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